Ryu descended into Glitchopolis's undercity, the Core Key Fragment glowing in his grip like a middle finger to Valdris. The five Patch Shards thrummed in his pocket, syncing into a buzz that rattled his skull. Stairs glitched—steps flickered between steel and pixel sludge, walls pulsed with static veins. Lira followed, Waffle Iron of the Grid hefted like a battering ram, her scowl cutting through the neon gloom. Gorv stomped, axe high, growling like a bear with a grudge. Pip trailed, toucan cawing flames, Dustbuster drone buzzing at his heels like a rabid pet.
The system flickered: [Location Discovered: Glitchopolis Undercity. Quest Update: Core's close—don't fuck it up, asshole.] A hum pulsed—deep, mechanical, wrong—echoing from a chamber ahead.
Snarkfang pulsed, runes flaring. "Undercity? You're gonna get glitch-fucked down here, shitlord—I'm stoked."
"Fuck you," Ryu snapped, slicing a static vine that glitched into a rubber foot and kicked itself away. "Core's mine—end of story."
"Keep dreaming, fuckface—something's itching to ruin your day. Stab it and let's roll."
The chamber opened—cavernous, lit by flickering neon tubes, floor a grid of cracked code-tiles. A dome shimmered at the center—pure glitch, pulsing red, the Core's heartbeat. But between Ryu and it? A swarm—hundreds of glitch-AI drones, spider-sized, skittering on pixelated legs, optics glowing "TERMINATE." [Enemy: Core Swarm (Level 50 Collective). Weakness: Maybe a broom? Good fucking luck.]
Ryu gripped Snarkfang. "Swarm time, fuckwits—don't choke."
Lira roared, "Crush these bugs!" and swung her iron—smashed three drones into sparks, metal crumpling. [Damage: 90. Effect: Swarm's dented.] No scrap talk—just a feral "More!" as she stomped another.
Snarkfang whistled. "Klepto's a fucking exterminator—keep her close, shitlord!"
Gorv bellowed, "NO MORE CRAWLERS!" and slammed his axe down—glitched into a shockwave, blasting a dozen drones into the walls. Code sprayed, tiles cracked. [Damage: 100. Effect: Swarm's scattered.]
Snarkfang snorted. "Big boy's a goddamn quake—still dumb as a rock, but I'll cheer."
Pip cackled, "Suck this, spider-shits!" and lobbed his Dustbuster. It glitched mid-air, turning into a flaming vacuum turret that rolled, sucking drones into a fiery maw. [Chaos Triggered: Vacuunado. Damage: 80.] The toucan dove, torching a cluster—optics melted. [Damage: 50.] Ryu grinned. "Pip's a walking war crime—finally useful."
The swarm screeched—optics synced, firing glitch-lasers. Ryu dodged, triggering Glitch Gash. Snarkfang slashed—a drone split, bleeding static that spread, frying its neighbors. [Glitch Gash Effect: Static Bleed. Damage: 120, Chain +5.] The swarm faltered, glitching mid-skitter.
Snarkfang cackled. "You're a fucking plague, dipshit—bleed 'em dry!"
Lasers grazed Ryu's arm—he grunted, blood mixing with static. [Damage: -25 HP. HP: 55/80.] Lira leapt, iron smashing a laser drone—sparks fried its optics. [Damage: 90.] Gorv roared, axe swinging—shockwave hit again, crushing a wave into pixel dust. [Damage: 110.] Pip's turret spun, vacuuming a dozen—toucan torched the pile, flames glitching into RGB splits. [Damage: 100.]
The swarm pulsed—merged into a mega-drone, car-sized, legs like buzzsaws, optics blaring "DELETE ALL." [Bug Overload: Swarmatron (Level 55).] It lunged—Ryu swung, Glitch Geyser hitting. The floor erupted—a fountain of glitchy staplers, firing staples that pinned the Swarmatron's legs. [Glitch Geyser Effect: Staple Storm. Damage: 130, Mobility -70.]
Snarkfang wheezed. "You're a fucking office nightmare, fuckface—I'm crying!"
The Swarmatron slashed—Ryu dodged, but a buzzsaw nicked his side. [Damage: -30 HP. HP: 25/80.] Lira charged, iron crashing its head—metal buckled, static gushing. [Damage: 100.] Gorv leapt, axe cleaving a leg off—code sprayed like piss. [Damage: 120.] Pip's turret rammed its gut, toucan torching the stump—flames glitched, frying circuits. [Damage: 110.]
Ryu grit his teeth. "Fuck you up!" He swung—Glitch Goad flared, runes taunting "PUSSYTRON" in its face. The Swarmatron's optics glitched, buzzsaws swinging wild—hit itself, carving a gash. [Glitch Goad Effect: Self-Fuckery.] He followed with Glitch Gatling—rubber skulls fired, chattering and gumming its joints. [Damage: 140.]
The mega-drone screeched—lasers pulsed. Ryu dove, but Lira took a hit, snarling as her arm bled static. [Damage to Lira: -20 HP.] She roared, "Die, fucker!" and smashed its optics—glass shattered, code bled. [Damage: 110.] Gorv charged, axe splitting its core—shockwave blew it apart. [Damage: 150.] Pip's toucan torched the wreckage, turret sucking the last scraps—Swarmatron bluescreened, collapsing into fizzing junk. [Swarmatron.exe terminated. +600 EXP. Level Up: Glitch Knight Rank 13. New Skill: Glitch Grind (Grinds enemies into glitch dust).]
Ryu panted, blood dripping, HP low. The Core dome pulsed brighter—unlocked, humming. Lira wiped her iron, growling, "Bugs're scrap." Gorv flexed, axe dripping code, grinning. Pip high-fived his toucan, turret sparking victory laps. A shard-key glowed in the wreckage—bigger, meaner. [Loot: Core Key Complete. Note: It's time, fucker.]
Snarkfang snorted. "You're a bloody shitlord, Ryu—nice swarm tan."
"Fuck off," Ryu muttered, grabbing the key.
The dome cracked—static roared, and a voice boomed: "PATCH OR PERISH, GLITCH KNIGHT." Ryu glared at his crew. "Move, fuckwits—Core's ours, and I'm not dying in this neon shithole."
Lira smirked. "Scrap's still mine."