Yun Yun stared at the tiny Purple Crystal Winged Lion Cub nestled against her.
It was nuzzling into her chest.
Purring.
Like a content little kitten.
Her eye twitched.
"Uh…"
Kaiser smirked. "Oh, don't mind him. He's just getting comfortable."
"…Comfortable?"
Yun Yun glanced down again.
The cub wasn't just lying there.
It was burrowing deeper—its tiny head snuggling against her chest.
And purring louder.
VERY LOUD.
Like a freaking earthquake.
Yun Yun froze.
Kaiser blinked.
Then, suddenly, his tail stiffened.
"Wait." His voice dropped. "Hold on."
The cub wasn't purring for him.
It was purring for HER.
Kaiser's grin vanished.
"…Traitor."
The cub ignored him.
Kaiser squinted.
HARD.
"…Hey." He poked the cub's back.
No reaction.
"…Yo." He flicked its ear.
The cub huffed and burrowed even deeper into Yun Yun's embrace.
Kaiser felt his soul leave his body.
No. No way.
"Are you serious?!" he barked. "I literally saved you! I fed you! I cuddled you! And you choose HER?!"
Yun Yun did not know how to react.
"…Is this happening?" she muttered.
"Oh, this is happening," Kaiser deadpanned.
The betrayal stung.
The cub—the very same cub he had risked his life for—was now acting like Yun Yun was its real parent.
Like he didn't even exist.
Kaiser huffed and crossed his arms.
"…Fine. Whatever. Do what you want."
The cub still didn't react.
Yun Yun sighed, looking at Kaiser's pouty expression.
"…Are you actually jealous of a baby beast?"
"YES."
There was zero hesitation.
Yun Yun almost lost it.
She bit her lip, barely holding back a laugh.
"Oh, this is rich."
Kaiser scoffed.
"It's not funny."
"It's hilarious."
Yun Yun was ENJOYING this.
She looked down at the cub, who was happily purring, completely ignoring the fuming Saiyan in the room.
Then, because she was feeling a little evil, she softly scratched behind the cub's ears.
The cub shuddered in delight—
Then rolled over onto its back, exposing its belly.
And PURRED EVEN LOUDER.
Kaiser clutched his chest.
"…He's never done that for me."
Yun Yun smirked.
"Oh? So it's just me?"
Kaiser looked like he wanted to cry.
The cub was straight-up flirting with her.
And Yun Yun?
She was soaking in the attention.
"So," she said smugly, "this is my cub now?"
Kaiser scowled.
"No. It's still mine."
Yun Yun mocked a gasp.
"Oh? But he seems to love me more. Maybe I should rename him."
Kaiser's tail puffed up.
"YOU WOULDN'T."
She tilted her head innocently.
"…What about 'Little Cloud'?"
"ABSOLUTELY NOT."
Kaiser grabbed the cub.
Held it up.
And stared into its tiny eyes.
"…Listen here, you little fluffball," he whispered, dead serious. "You are MY son. Not hers. MINE."
The cub blinked.
Then—
SLAP!
A tiny paw scratched Kaiser's nose.
Hard.
Kaiser let out a SCREAM.
Not a manly scream.
Not a warrior's battle cry.
But a high-pitched, dying-animal, my-soul-has-left-my-body SHRIEK.
"AAAAAGGHHH!"
Yun Yun lost it.
She fell back onto the bed, clutching her stomach, laughing so hard she couldn't breathe.
Kaiser stumbled back, hands on his nose, tail standing straight up in pure SHOCK.
"WHAT—THE—HELL?!" he choked out.
The cub yawned.
Then turned its back on him and snuggled into Yun Yun's arms again.
Like nothing happened.
Kaiser was traumatized.
Yun Yun was crying from laughter.
And the cub?
The cub had no regrets.
Kaiser glared at the tiny beast.
"…I should've left you in the forest."
Yun Yun cackled.
Kaiser was fuming.
The **cub—HIS cub—**was still snuggled up against Yun Yun, completely ignoring him.
It wasn't fair.
He saved that little furball.
And now?
He was being treated like background furniture.
Kaiser's eye twitched.
"…Fine. If you won't notice me, I'll make you."
Slowly, he lifted his tail.
And then—
Poke.
His tail lightly jabbed Yun Yun's arm.
She blinked.
"…Did you just poke me?"
"No."
"…Your tail is literally jabbing my shoulder."
"No, it's not."
Yun Yun narrowed her eyes.
Kaiser smirked.
And then—
Poke.
"…Kaiser."
"Hmm?"
Poke.
"…Stop."
Poke. Poke.
Yun Yun's eyebrow twitched.
Then—
Something grabbed his tail.
Kaiser froze.
Slowly, he turned his head.
The cub was staring at his tail.
Its tiny paws wrapped around it.
Its eyes wide with fascination.
It wiggled its little butt.
Kaiser's soul left his body.
"…Oh, no."
CHOMP.
The cub pounced, sinking its tiny teeth into his tail.
Kaiser let out a SCREAM that shook the house.
"AAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH!"
Instant regret.
His Saiyan soul was in agony.
Yun Yun burst out laughing.
She watched in pure amusement as Kaiser wriggled around, desperately trying to shake the cub off.
"LET GO, YOU DEMON!"
The cub refused.
Instead, it clung tighter.
And then—
It started batting at his tail.
Like a freaking kitten.
Kaiser felt his pride shatter.
He, a Saiyan warrior, was being toyed with by a baby beast.
This was rock bottom.
Yun Yun smirked.
Then—
She poked the cub.
Its ears twitched.
Slowly, it turned away from Kaiser's tail…
And nuzzled back into Yun Yun's arms.
Like Kaiser was nothing.
Like he didn't exist.
Kaiser stared.
Mouth open.
Mind blank.
"…You little…"
The cub purred.
Then, casually, it climbed up and plopped itself on Yun Yun's chest.
And then—
It started kneading.
Soft little paws.
Pressing.
Squishing.
Kneading.
Yun Yun froze.
Kaiser's eye twitched.
"…Is he…"
Both of them watched in horror as the cub continued making biscuits.
On her chest.
Both her breasts were being kneaded.
Kaiser's tail shot straight up.
His face twitched.
Jealousy hit him like a meteor.
"…Oh, HELL no."
Without thinking—
He lunged forward.
And pinned Yun Yun's chest down with both hands.
Yun Yun froze.
The room went silent.
Kaiser blinked.
Realization hit him like a truck.
He was palming her chest.
With both hands.
Right in front of her.
Slowly…
Very slowly…
He looked up.
Yun Yun was staring at him.
Glaring.
Murderously.
Kaiser's soul left his body for the second time.
"…Uh—"
WHACK.
The pillow slammed into his face.
He went flying off the bed.
CRASH.
Kaiser hit the floor, arms and legs sprawled out like a dead insect.
Silence.
Yun Yun huffed.
The cub?
It stretched, curled back up on her chest, and continued purring.
Kaiser?
He was staring at the ceiling, regretting every decision in his life.