The Mercenaries of Mayhem stood awkwardly in the dragon's cavern, still processing the fact that the supposedly fearsome beast was more interested in reading books than roasting adventurers.
The dragon sighed, stretching its massive wings before folding them neatly. "Alright. Let's be practical. You came here for an elixir, and I don't feel like incinerating you for interrupting my reading. So, let's make a deal."
Bob perked up. "Oh! We love deals!"
Derek muttered, "That is objectively false."
Ignoring them, the dragon turned and rummaged through a pile of perfectly organized glass bottles on a stone shelf. After a moment, it picked up a small vial filled with a softly glowing blue liquid and held it up.
"This," the dragon said dramatically, "is a potion I accidentally brewed a while ago."
Marcus squinted. "Wait, accidentally?"
The dragon waved a claw dismissively. "I was experimenting with alchemy, and it turns out I'm very good at it. This one wasn't what I intended, but it does have interesting effects."
Bob leaned in, fascinated. "Ooooh. What happens if you drink it?"
The dragon shrugged. "Nothing serious. It boosts healing, increases stamina for a while, and makes wounds close faster. It's basically a very strong recovery potion."
Jim rubbed his chin. "So… no youth magic?"
The dragon snorted. "No. That's a myth. But to mortals, anything that glows and has magical properties looks rare and valuable."
Bob's eyes widened. "Ohhhh. So, if we bring this back, that noble lady will totally believe it's the elixir she wanted!"
Marcus frowned. "I feel like that's a very dangerous assumption."
Jim took a swig of ale. "Hey, lying isn't illegal—just morally flexible."
Derek crossed his arms. "And if she finds out?"
"..."
The dragon chuckled. "You humans are absurd. But fine. Take this and tell no one about me."
Bam, who had been oddly silent, finally nodded. "Agreed. Secrets are sacred."
Jim squinted at him. "Did you just say that because it sounded dramatic?"
Bam simply smiled. "There are always exceptions."
The dragon rolled its eyes. "Alright. Deal's made. Now get out so I can finish my book."
Bob took the potion very carefully. "Pleasure doing business with you, Your Dragonly Majesty."
The dragon gave him a long, tired look.
Derek grabbed Bob's collar. "We're leaving before you ruin this."
And with that, the Mercenaries of Mayhem successfully—against all odds—walked away from a dragon's lair with treasure and all their limbs intact.