During the day, she went to school and had fun with her best friend, Maki. Talking with her first crush, playing baseball, drawing, and painting in art class. During the night, assisting her father's work, negotiating with clients, killing, and more killing. It was like Killa living a double life. Her father gave her harder and harder missions, but she did it very well because Yeongho was always there with her, supporting her.
Some girls in school wondered who she was and who her family was, and some girls fought with her, but Killa kept her actions well. Killa used only verbals to fight back, which annoyed them.
The more she got to know a life besides killing and blood, the more she tended to know herself what she wanted. The art class assignment that the teacher gave to students. On the due date, Killa didn't give the homework to her, and she told her the real reason was that she didn't know what she liked but knew what she hated. So, the teacher gave her more time and suggested she should try something that she hadn't done yet.
After she took her time using her knife and her fist and resting on her bed, she dug her brain deep and talked with her heart, feeling her soul, realizing what she truly wanted. She would like to try to live a life where she can do everything she wants without worrying about her father and not living under his power, orders, or eyes, an easy word—freedom.
So, she gave her teacher a blank white paper for her art class homework and waited to explain her excuse.
"What is it, Miss Lysander?" The art teacher asked,
"My homework," Killa said,
"You still don't know what you like?" The art teacher asked,
"I know now," she said. The art teacher turned the blank page to the other side and saw nothing but white. "I like to be free," she paused. Freedom...I could not just draw something and express my passion on paper. And I haven't tasted a life...or a feeling about freedom yet." The teacher listened quietly. You said I should try something that I haven't done yet."
"So, that's why you sent me a blank paper. You are very honest with yourself, Miss Lysander." the art teacher smiled. "At least you write your name...Then, I am going to grade you anyway, right?" she asked,
"I'm sorry, teacher," Killa said,
"No, don't be...you answered the questions perfectly—just like other students but with different expressions, in different forms." She smiled, "Actually, I am looking forward to seeing your technique and practical art in drawing or painting because I have seen you in class. You are very into it. Your eyes are drowning into the frame in front of you."
Killa was surprised by what she said because she never knew that she would show her expression in that way while doing that. She surely really likes drawing and painting some color on something.
"Your technique is quite good but not that perfectly great. With some training and practicing, it will lead you far. I know you realized what you like–you want to be free, you want freedom, right? Art is almost the same thing." Killa was listening intently. "There are no rules about art. There is no square frame that cages your expression or to try something new, something different. Art is free, free to see, free to admire, free to feel. Do you know what makes art so special in a person's work? Because it's original, unique, the way and the result of the reason behind a person's work–the experience and the goal are very special. Like the homework you sent me, it's special for you, and I have heard your reason. I admire and feel it." she paused and looked directly at her, "So, it's worth my while to wait for your work, Miss Lysander."
"Thank you," Killa said, and she felt so wholesome in her stomach as if something was going to run out. The feeling rose to her heart, and her lips curled like the notches in her brain.
"But next time, try to be practical, okay?" the art teacher said,
"Yes, thank you," Killa said,
However, she cannot destroy the roots of the coping mechanism since childhood. How she knew, how she received, and how she was forced to react. No matter how she passes through that, it will come back when the surroundings, some events, or situations force her to show and expose herself. And especially when we are in the corner, can't find any windows to escape, can't find any tools to support the real root will surface and embrace us—it's not a bad thing. It helps us and supports us like an old friend. But are we ready to face it or not?
Would she embrace it or run as if it were a dark storm?
Another day at school and another day that the universe or some invisible fate destined for her—to test, to trigger her nerves, and wait to see her react. Or it was just a random daily event that could happen expectedly to anyone unlucky.
"Maki Maki!!" one of Maki's classmates ran to the classroom and called her
"What!? I'm playing," Maki said, but her eyes were still looking at her phone,
"Killa!" she shouted,
"What? Killa, what?" Maki turned to her immediately,
"Senpais is harassing her in the bathroom!" she said loudly,
"What!!!" Maki shouted louder and ran out immediately
Killa stood still and listened to a group of older girls talk bad things to her in the girls' bathroom.
"How many times do I have to tell you? STOP tagging with Daiki. You look so pathetic when I see you walking around, following him," said girl number one.
"I didn't follow him," Killa said,
"You're gonna say that, Daiki? Who is the one following you," said girl number one.
"No," Killa said,
"This is the last time. I'm not gonna let you slide anymore..."
"I hope so," Killa said,
"You little whore,"girl number two said,
'Whore?' Killa thought. Killa had seen one of the whores, and she raised her eyebrows, picturing herself to one of the beautiful ladies she had seen, but one thing that was uncommon between her and those beautiful ladies, Killa was still a virgin.
"I didn't do anything to you because all the boys in school would come after me..." said girl number one. Other girls glanced at her a little bit, "You should just pick one boy; why do you gotta follow around, My Daiki!!?" She shouted and came closer to Killa. "But I don't care anymore...Your little annoying, pretty princess's face will be the one that no one would even want to gaze at you."
Killa stared at them without fear and without words.
Maki ran through other students in the hallway and took her time to get through the crowd. She pushed to the door and got inside. Suddenly, Maki stopped her action, and her eyes opened wide after seeing the bodies lying down. They were all hurting and got bruises, and there was blood on the floor. She turned to look at Killa, who was standing like nothing had happened.
After that, Killa and all the girls were called to the principal, who called their parents.
"I didn't do it," Killa said,
"You are a Liar!! Look at my daughter's face, and look at you! " said the mother of one of those girls.
"Miss Lysander just told me the truth...you used violence on other students." The principal said,
"We should say, why did you use the violence in the school!?" The other mother said. "And where are your parents anyway?"
"I've already called them, so please, Mrs. Joanne," the principal tried to calm her down.
"I'm not going to wait. You need to punish that girl now!!" she said, "Just expel her!!"
"We have to wait for Miss Lysander's parents." The principal said,
All the students were standing, peeking, and eavesdropping outside the office. And there was a middle man with gray hair, big, tall, and more muscular than you guys in the school here. He was wearing a soft gray suit over a dark blue shirt with a black tie. He was walking using a fancy crane to match his suit.
"Who's that?"
"O-M-G!!"
"Don't tell me he is...Killa's father?"
"Oh my gosh...Are they bodyguards!!!?"
And then the office's door opened. Germogen's first view was her pretty daughter standing still with both hands behind her back, holding them together and just letting other people point and scold her.
"I'm here," Germogen announced himself calmly,
"Finally!…." they shouted and turned to see Killa's father. Then they stopped their actions.
"What happened?" Germogen asked,
"Mr. Lysander, your kid hurt other girls." The principal said,
Germogen turned to see the victims, and they were shaking in fear. "Did you do it?" he asked her own daughter,
"I didn't," Killa said,
"Stop lying!! Then why did my daughter's face get bruised?" one of the mothers shouted in a pitchy voice.
Germogen turned to face the mothers."My daughter said she didn't do it."
"And you believe her!!?" she shouted,
"And you believed your daughter when she told what happened?" Germogen asked,
They shut their mouths. "Hey, you have to do something! She's the only one who didn't get hurt." one of the mothers said to the principal.
The principal was quiet.
"Why? Do you want to expel my kid? Even if you don't have any evidence?" Germogen asked,
"This is the evidence!" The mother grabbed her daughter's face.
"Killa, what do you think you want to do?" Germogen tried to keep calm and asked his daughter,
They were all shocked. "What!?" People in the room were stunned and upset.
"If expulsion is the punishment, I accept it...but I didn't hurt them...if my words can't be trusted, I wonder why you can trust their words theirs, principal," Killa said,
Germogen listened to her daughter's speech silently and watched their reactions. "I would like my daughter to leave this school."
"What?" Some of the mothers said,
"Not for expelling but the lack of justice, inability to handle the situations, and...you can not even do the right thing even if you know what is right and wrong. " Germogen said in his deep voice. The principal was still silent, but his sweat ran like a waterfall. "I want you to resign, Killa. This school does not suit you at all," he said to her,
"Mr. Lysander..." The principal called,
"Killa, are you gonna stand still and let them do this? Give me your hand." Germogen said. Then, people in the room concentrated, and Killa gave her hand to her father. "My daughter's hand was hurt...her blood is leaking...and your kids just got bruises...what are you gonna do, principal?" he asked,
"I'm sorry, Mr. Lysander...she didn't say anything." The principal seemed embarrassed.
"She told you she didn't do it, but I know how things run in this school. Money can solve everything, right?" Germogen said as everybody had already shut their mouths.
"I'll send you a resignation paper for my daughter. I'll take her back home now. Killa," Germogen said the last word,
"Yes, father," Killa said,
Germogen, Killa, his best man, left the principal's office. And the rest of his bodyguards waiting for their masters outside the door. They walked out and passed all the students through the hallway. Killa saw Maki standing, watching her with a worried look, so Killa smiled at her. She turned to see Daiki running towards the way, and he stopped after seeing her. Killa looked at his face, and she had to act like nothing. She walked past him while her father glanced at her and Daiki.