If you're careless, then you'll die in this endless dream.
That's the rule.
...
Until you have souls.
[ YOUR BODY IS NOT CAPABLE OF HANDLING FIRE ELEMENT LVL.3 ]
[ FIRE ELEMENT HAS BEEN DEDUCED --> LVL.3 - LVL.1 ]
[ A PENALTY WILL BE APPLIED FOR USING A SKILL THAT ISN'T SUITABLE FOR YOU ]
I realized my mistake a bit too late.
Just before the clash of fists—my left flaming fist against the spider's leg—my left arm burst.
BOOM!—SCHLORP!
Blood splattered everywhere.
Splat! Splat!
A lot of blood.
Splat! Splat! Splat!
I fell to my knees, crying in pain.
"ARGHHHH!!! …Fuck… fuck… the blood… The blood isn't stopping…"
I lost another arm.
I had become an expert at losing arms… wow.
This wasn't how it was supposed to happen, was it?
Everything was going perfectly… Then how did it turn out like this?!
I looked at my system screen.
[ YOUR BODY IS NOT CAPABLE OF HANDLING FIRE ELEMENT LVL.3 ]
[ FIRE ELEMENT HAS BEEN DEDUCED --> LVL.3 - LVL.1 ]
[ A PENALTY WILL BE APPLIED FOR USING A SKILL THAT ISN'T SUITABLE FOR YOU ]
Fuck.
How could I forget about this?
I realized something.
I looked up… toward the beast standing in front of me.
I was too late to realize it.
I made another mistake… shifting my focus to my injuries… giving the beast the chance to eliminate me.
THUD!—SHLURP!—SQUIRT!
The spider stabbed its leg into my neck.
"Agh… hhkk—!"
The spider lifted me using its leg.
Fuck… I'll die at this rate.
I was struggling to breathe.
"Ghhk—ghh…!"
So this is how it ends, huh…?
No… no! I won't stop.
I'll use fire ele—
[ YOU'RE RESTRICTED FROM USING FIRE ELEMENT FOR 2 MINUTES ]
I looked at the system screen in shock.
I was afraid… afraid of death.
I… I need to do something.
I continuously started punching the spider's leg… out of panic.
"Ghhk…!"
SPLURT! SMACK!
Blood was spurting from my neck… a lot of blood.
Why…? Why…? Why am I so stupid?!
I kept swinging my legs… hoping to find solid ground to stand on.
…
I couldn't find it.
How could I make a mistake like this? How could I forget that I'd be charged a penalty if I used something beyond my body's capabilities?
Blood started pouring from my mouth… as always… a lot of blood.
My eyes turned red.
I was too careless.
Blood started flowing from my nose… from my eyes…
I swung my legs faster.
"Guh… kkhh…"
A moment later, my legs stopped… my hands stopped.
My mouth hung open… blood kept flowing from it.
I died.
Again.
It was a quick death… but a painful one.
[ YOU HAVE DIED ]
[ DUE TO YOUR CONTINUOUS DEATHS, YOU WILL BE REVIVED IN 10 MINUTES ]
The spider realized its enemy was dead, so it smashed me against a nearby building.
FWOOSH!—SMASH!
I died a brutal death.
[ YOU WILL REMAIN IN THE PRESENCE OF THE VOID FOR 10 MINUTES UNTIL YOU ARE REVIVED ]
My eyes opened.
"...Huh?"
I was in a black void.
I couldn't see anything else.
My body was glowing light yellow… well, it wasn't my body. It was just my soul form. Back then, my soul form was light yellow.
Every part of my body was light yellow.
I closed my eyes.
So I died… which means I'm in my soul form… I have to stay here in the presence of the void… which means this is the Endless Void Chamber, where all the souls gather to be corrupted.
I left my body, which means I'm no longer dreaming. The souls that die in the endless dream are transported here… to the Endless Void Chamber, where they become corrupt and are devoured by the Void.
And I'm one of them.
But I won't be devoured… instead, another soul I collected will be devoured in my place.
I still have a chance of becoming a corrupt soul.
But besides that… my soul form is light yellow, which is the closest to white—the color known as the corrupted form of a soul in the Endless Dream.
It doesn't make sense. White is supposed to symbolize purity.
But in the Endless Dream… it isn't pure at all.
The purer the soul, the more corrupted it is.
That's the most basic rule of the Endless Dream.
Which means I'm so close to becoming corrupted… I'm pure and corrupted at the same time, huh? That's rare.
But… why do I feel so calm about it? Being close to corruption isn't great at all. I should be worried about my future in the Endless Dream.
But I don't feel worried at all…!
Just what is this feeling…?
I don't feel afraid of anything…
Am I becoming corrupt…?
No, there's no need to worry so much. I died… I did a great job surviving so long in the dream, so I'm being rewarded.
That's right…! It feels so great…
I smiled gently while looking at my hands.
"Why was I even afraid of dying? I died, and now I'm in a place where I can feel at ease."
I looked around at the darkness surrounding me.
"There's no need to be afraid of death if we get to be this calm after dying. All my worries… they're gone!"
I closed my eyes and smiled in excitement.
If the afterlife is supposed to be this calm, then there's no need to fear death! Yes, death is the best!
…
Fuck it.
It's not possible.
You can't possess me.
You can't make me corrupt by making me possessed.
I looked down.
I should regret dying so early… leaving my companions alone in the Endless Dream to die by themselves.
But I don't feel regret.
Memories of being a writer hit me.
Why don't I regret my decisions?
Why do I think ruining the Endless Dream was a good idea?
I didn't feel this before… then why now?
All of this is my mistake… I killed my characters without mercy…
I blamed myself all the time, and now… I feel good? I feel good for killing them?
Fuck it! Shut it!
I never, ever felt good about killing my characters. Then why do I feel good now?
I'm a stupid bastard who always regretted his decisions. But now, all of a sudden… I feel good about them?
Images of Lee Seonyeon and Han Chaeyoung flashed through my mind.
I left them alone… all by themselves… and I don't regret it?
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
Tears burst from my eyes.
If… if… if I never left them alone… then… then I would have been with them instead of fighting against Skill Plagiarist… souls… and now this void…
The real obstacle is me.
If I want to save others, then I need to do something I can't do… something I would never think of… something that even I, the author of this novel, would never imagine.
I need to do something beyond my own thoughts to save those destined to die.
So why is this afterlife so calm?
It's calm because I'm the one who wrote it to be calm.
Can the afterlife really be this peaceful?
Of course not.
Was my life this peaceful?
Of course not.
Do I deserve this much peace in life or in death?
In life.
Then I need to create peace in my life, right?
Right.
…
"Hahahahaha… HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! HAHAHAHAHA!!"
I was laughing.
Laughing desperately.
I looked into the darkness with wide eyes.
"FUCK IT!! IT CAN'T BE THIS PEACEFUL!! THIS ISN'T THE AFTERLIFE I WANTED… THIS ISN'T PEACEFUL!! I LEFT EVERYONE BEHIND AND GOT… CALMNESS!? SHUT IT!"
I looked down.
"Life… life is supposed to be calm… the afterlife isn't supposed to be calm. The peace we long for our entire lives needs to be found in the life we are living…"
"Not in the afterlife…"
I wiped my tears and glared into the darkness.
"If there's no peace in our lives… then I'll create it!!"
"I'll create a peaceful life, even if I have to sacrifice myself for the peace of others…"
"…I won't hesitate to kill you to create peace for my companions!!"
I took a deep breath.
"I hope you heard me clearly…"
"The Void."
〆 Peace isn't found in death… it's something you fight for in life.
— Kang Hong