Chapter 15 :
11 June, Tuesday, 2024
7:35 a.m.
Arnav's POV
Something immensely bright hit my face as I groaned. Turning away my head, I squeezed my eyes holding my head.
Sliding away the duvet from my body, I sat up straight on my bed.
I was still holding my head with my eyes shut tightly. The throbbing feeling inside my head was eating me out. My whole body is aching. I couldn't even feel the cold air of the AC because a burning feeling was there in each and every fibre of my body.
Massaging my temples, I sighed before opening my eyes.
Picking up the telephone from the bedside stand, I said as soon as the call connected, "Bring me my tea."
Throwing it there, I got off the bed. My morning was itself starting with frustration so I don't know how I'll manage the day.
I had even forgotten that today I had my haldi ceremony until maa yelled from the other side of the closed door of my room, "Arnav, get ready quickly. The Haldi ceremony is going to start soon. We need to leave. And yeah, cover those marks."
I remained silent listening to her words before voicing out a 'yeah'. But what I didn't get were her last words.
Which marks?
I scrunched my brows prior to shrugging my shoulders and walked inside the bathroom.
Picking up the brush, I put some toothpaste on it before wetting it under the tap.
As I rose my head to look at my reflection, my gaze fell on my neck.
Marks after marks are there. There were almost four to five marks if I'm not wrong. And they're not some normal marks but fucking ass hickeys.
When did I sleep with someone? I don't even remember a thing-
Anika.
I fisted my hands on the sink's edge as I remembered the previous night's activities. I didn't remember much but just hearing one of my bestfriends giving some dare to Anika and the rest of the events were just blurry memories inside my head.
My head was throbbing but all the pain had been replaced by anger and disgust. That woman can really stoop too low to get what she wanted.
She really took advantage of my drunk state.
She even dared to fucking mark me. It disgusted me.
But it hurt me too. It hurt me that I had an intimate night with the one whom my brother loved so much who in return left him shattered. Who in return is now the subject of my revenge, yet, I stepped on my words.
Shutting my eyes before opening them and glaring at the marks, I gritted my teeth.
.
"Be fast okay bhai?", said Aisha, fixing my floral half jacket over the white kurta.
I nodded.
As she left, I spared a glance at myself through the mirror.
I hated the fact that my outfit would match with her. Maa had seized each and every chance to make us stick together or make us look like a lovely couple. She and papa have had a successful love marriage and expected the same from me.
I never lied to her but some lies are just better than the truth which will give wounds rather than healing something.
I sighed.
Spraying some cologne on myself, I left my room, to downstairs. I don't want to face Dhruv after what shitty act I involved myself in last night.
.
Anika's POV
Tears streamed down my cheeks uncontrollably while a relentless ache burnt in my chest suffocating me. I felt as if someone were choking me, draining every breath out of me.
I found myself utterly powerless.
Those promises, those words, those cherished memories and those love letters-everything would be turned into ashes the moment I confront Dhruv.
I felt deeply ashamed, not for my inability to defend myself but for not fighting for our special bond.
At times, I wished for oblivion, yet life had twisted me in such a situation from which I can neither retreat nor vanish.
If I did, one after another life would be erased, leaving my soul wandering aimlessly, burdened by the guilt of having taken so many lives even if it had never been my intention.
The anguish in his eyes, the ache of betrayal, the suffering from deceit and the pain of being perpetually deceived-would flash in his eyes.
Those honey brown orbs which always glimmered with hope and positivity, will lose all their shine.
And the sole reason will be me.
It was the least thing I can discern. I never intended to bring him to tears; yet, I'll be the cause for anguish I will shatter, who had once mended my heart.
I came back to reality when someone shook me. Still lost in my thoughts, I looked up to see Rooh staring at me with concern.
"Why are you crying?", she asked cupping my cheeks.
Touching my cheeks, I realised they were wet. I didn't know the agony in my heart brought tears to my eyes.
Wiping them away with a sniff I said, "It's nothing. The eyeliner burns my eyes. I have never applied this brand's cosmetics before."
The stoic look she gave me brought me to believe that she didn't buy my lie.
"You haven't even done any makeup. Where did eyeliner come from? You're bad at lying Ms. Anika Roy Chowdhury. Is it about Dhruv?", she spoke sternly before her voice softened when she asked about him.
I looked around the room to find no one.
I nodded hanging my head low.
She sighed.
Crouching down infront of the couch I was seated on, she raised up my chin locking our eyes.
"Trust me, even if he had been awake, he'd have been hurt seeing you cry more than being hurt by what you did. I had told you, it wasn't your fault. Fate played that game which unfortunately ruined your life the most. But let's not talk about it. We've already talked about it a lot and since today is your haldi, just forget all these and get ready. His family would be here any time. Hm?", she spoke softly as I nodded.
"This Anika was hidden for years, then why did it appear suddenly? But anyways, don't break down okay. The makeup artists have arrived. Get ready okay? I'll be back", she spoke while scrolling through her phone.
I hummed.
As she left, a middle aged woman dressed elegantly in a wine red suit and skirt with an off-white shirt beneath. Her mahogany straight high-low bob cut hair sharpened her face features.
Rosa Goenka, one the best bridal makeup artists of India, had been appointed by my mami. A very dear friend of hers.
This woman exuded a strong feminine vibe and the boldness her upturned chestnut brown eyes held was rare. But she had always been soft and kind to me. Her only daughter, Vidhi Goenka, was my bestfriend.
Being from a patriarchal family of in-laws, she had divorced her husband just after Vid's tenth birthday. She had struggled a lot for who she was at present.
"Oh my goodness! Meri beti itni badi kab ho gayi?", she exclaimed, walking inside in her maroon Louis Vuitton heels. Engulfing me in her warm hug, she patted my back and hugged back.
(When did my daughter grow up so much?)
The Rosa Goenka everyone knew-the woman with stringent principles, was the total opposite with me.
Breaking away, I smiled at her, "Time flies aunty."
She nodded with a warm smile.
Holding onto my side arms, she examined my attire.
I was clad in a floral saree with a deep cut blouse. My hair was done by Rooh into a French bun with some flowers.
"As always, the Anika Roy Chowdhury I've always known, is dressed simply but sophisticated. You're gorgeous", she complimented.
I smiled in return. Leading me to my vanity, she asked me to sit down and soon started assisting her team to get me ready.
I just opted for a minimal makeup look.
A bride would've been happy and excited to get ready for her groom but I had no reason to do so. So simply dressing was the last option.
After almost one and half an hour, I was ready to look at myself in the mirror.
The moment I opened my eyes, I just couldn't recognise myself.
My eyes had some shades of deep brown ascending to the lightest peach shade that went with my skin tone with some slight pink shimmer on it. The eyeliner and mascara outlined my eyes. My lips were painted in mute brown and the rest of the makeup highlighted my cheeks.
It was simple but of my style.
She always knew what was the best for me, like how maa used to.
Fixing a small maroon bindi above the glabella, I looked up at her through the mirror.
"You did the best as always surprising me at the end. I love it", I spoke to her with the brightest smile I could possibly provide to anyone after the previous events with Rooh.
Resting her hands softly on my shoulders, she looked down at me through the mirror and said, "It's just the start. The main look I've selected for you is the main surprise."
I nodded with a smile.
.
A bride always wishes to take her farewell from her own house while having a last hug with her parents as just their daughter, not being someone's wife or daughter-in-law.
She always wishes to find comfort and home in her husband. She wishes to be cherished and valued for the rest of the life.
Taking the sacred fire as the witness to the sat pheras, she wishes to have all the seven promises to be fulfilled.
(Seven rounds around the sacred fire)
Not every bride has the same wish but these are some wishes all of them have. But not me.
I couldn't wish for anything except the fact that I had to fulfill the duty I was selected for. I needed to fulfill my responsibility before I...quit.
It'll be like a sin to think of such a negative thing like dying when haldi itself means to shoo away the evil from the bride and the groom. But there was nothing positive in my life, so were in my thoughts. So it didn't matter to me at all.
I was sitting beside him on the white couch placed on the stage inside the beautifully decorated pandal in my mama's mansion.
The hustle and bustle in the mansion had busied everyone to make them notice the unwanted tension between him and me. We both despised each other, yet, we're getting ready to have each other's haldi on each other's skin.
At first my mami came forward to apply the paste on me.
"I pray to God that today, he takes away all the evil powers around you both for the rest of your lives", she said smiling at me and him, applying the turmeric paste on my cheeks, chest and arms.
I smiled.
Then she turned towards him and said while applying, "You're looking really handsome. How will my daughter handle you?", her laughter ended her sentence.
Everyone laughed except for both of us who just smiled, a façade.
I never knew that mami and maa had planned to have him and me wear matching outfits. Not just color, but the prints matched too.
The moment he had entered the pandal and his eyes locked with mine, I did admit he was looking drop dead gorgeous. But the glares of hatred we threw at each other diminished the fleeting admire that flickered in our eyes.
After mami went back, my dadi came forward.
"Meri bacchi sachme badi ho gayi", she spoke as tears glistened in her eyes.
(My daughter has really grown up)
I wiped those tears that stung my heart and smiled, "Don't cry right now dadi. Bidai hona baki hai", I tried to lighten her mood and I fortunately succeeded.
(The farewell is yet to be done)
"I have a surprise for you", she whisper-yelled. I furrowed my brows when she moved towards him and there my eyes widened.
Infront of me, stood two more of the most-dearest people of my life.
My nana and nani.
I was shocked but the burst of happiness inside me brought tears to my eyes. I was seeing them after more than four years.
The last time we had met was...when I was crying my heart out seeing my parents' bloody bodies covered with white clothes.
I wiped away the tears as they approached me.
Standing up, I bent down taking their blessings.
"Jeti raho meri bacchi. Sada khush aur suhagan raho", both of them spoke in unison.
(Live long my daughter. Always stay married)
In that moment, it didn't matter to me if they were blessing me for something useless but their presence. They were there and I was beyond happy. I was just too busy to even care for my family years ago.
Drowning myself in work was the only way to keep myself away from those thoughts.
The ceremony continued further.
Everyone happily applied haldi on me except his dadi and chachi, who were completely unpleased to do that. But still they did because they had to.
But the main part came at last. The part I dreaded the most.
He was facing me and the same goes for me. The cold air between us went unnoticed by everyone. Every time our gazes met, all I could feel were some electric waves running down my veins. He felt different today. Beside hatred, there was something more that his eyes bore today. He was like a book tightly closed in a box with a lock. And no one knew where the key was hidden.
Someone forwarded the bowl having the turmeric paste towards him so that he can apply first.
His cold gaze never left mine as he took some paste in his hand.
The fleeting smirk on his lips infuriated me.
Forwarding his hand, he slowly slid the tip of his fingers from my right cheek to my neck stopping above my chest. The softness he held surprised me. But if we had been alone, maybe he'd have choked me but wouldn't have let me die.
Then he did the same to my left cheek.
The shivering feeling of the coldness of his skin provided me made me break the eye contact for a short second before I locked it again.
My breaths were unsteady and the close proximity between us tensed me further.
I never knew that I'd fall so weak infront of him. I couldn't even fight because I'd embarrass myself, for he had already bound my hands keeping me away from fighting to break free.
"How did it feel last night, Mrs. Rai Mehrotra? Had a nice sleep maybe, after taking advantage of the drunken me", he whispered so close to me that our lips might meet any moment.
My heart thumped against my ribs.
The fear I had since morning after waking up and remembering nothing much but some hazy memories and the mistake I had made while being intoxicated, finally came true.
I knew that the very moment he remembered everything, he'd either mock me or insult me.
I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror after that. I was very much ashamed of myself for flowing away forgetting the mess I was in.
I neither replied to his question nor showed any expression except coldness.
My gaze didn't waver away but my heart betrayed me.
Taking my silence as my answer, he distanced himself away from me.
I nonchalantly applied haldi on his face and hands with a fake smile before finally sighing in relief.
.
It was past four in the afternoon. Everyone was sitting in the main hall for some talks about the marriage, which is the day after tomorrow.
Even though if I wished for the marriage to be postponed as far as possible, it'll inevitably occur one day. We cannot escape the repercussions of our actions, and I'm no exception.
He was there to exact retribution for my deeds, and this marriage merely served as a convenient pretext to achieve his aims without much effort.
This marriage will amount to nothing more than shackles binding me within a golden cage. I'll be ensnared in luxury, yet my freedom will be the price paid.
The liberty I had always cherished and revered will be stripped away from me, leaving me powerless to act.
I can't even raise my voice, for I had already signed my own decree of ruin.
I had always returned in kind to those who betrayed me, now it was my turn.
He's here. He'll be another hell I never knew I would walk through again.
My thoughts halted when I felt a harsh tug on my wrist pulling me away from the end of the top floor's sitting area.
It was wide and open with fake green grass carpets laid everywhere. There was a swimming pool made of fake stones which had some artificial green plants around it and had lights at some places to light it up at night. A small area near the pool was there. It had a roof standing with the support of four poles made of white cloth and has been decorated with some fairy lights. Under it is a mattress to sit on and some pillows.
A grey coffee table with two grey single sofas are placed at one corner for the best view of both sunset and sunrise.
It was all maa and papa's planning. We used to have nice evening tea and talks while having snacks. Sometimes mama and mami used to come over with Yuvraj bhai, Aniket and Rhea di. We used to have fun but everything turned upside down that night.
I hissed when a sudden force was felt on my skin.
I furrowed my brows and looked up to see myself slammed against the wall of the storeroom, by him. Both of my hands were bound to the wall, his fingers tightly wrapped around my wrists. He will leave marks again.
I hissed at the burning sensation and the way his gaze remained fixed on mine, I knew he was up to something.
"Leave me Arnav it's hurting", I hissed. I threw glares at him despite his unaffected expressions.
There lingered an unknown bitterness on his face. He had been glaring at me since the moment we were here, on the rooftop.
"It's hurting? So soon? Then how will you bear the upcoming surprises, doll?", he asked, bitterness lacing his voice.
"I have agreed to let you decide the consequences of my actions but I didn't sign for sudden outbursts of yours. You better keep it in control", I replied glaring at him.
"Yeah sure thing. But the pain you had inflicted upon him for years till today, it has to be covered up, right? So bear it silently", he spoke tightening his grip more, just a moment away from breaking my wrist bones.
My eyes stung with my unshed tears as I gulped.
Sometimes it was too overwhelming to face everything all at once.
"I am. I am already bearing a lot. Itna toh seh rahi hu, aur seh lungi", I whispered.
(I'm already bearing so much, so I'll bear more)
To me, tears weren't weaknesses. It was just the pain in a person pouring from their eyes. Those drops were bits of vulnerability and anguish a person hid within. They're sometimes of agony and sometimes of fury.
But if I shed those tears, I'd fall weak infront of him. I'll be the vulnerable Anika Roy Chowdhury whom I hate.
I remained still in my place but kept staring into his eyes. For sure he could clearly see the glistening tears in the eyes under the sunset rays. I was tired of the same pain in my chest which never fades.
It was too frustrating and painful to bear the same thing on and on for so long.
He didn't speak anything else but left my wrists prior to storming out of the place.
As the door to the stairs closed with a thud, my tears rolled down as I looked at my wrists.
They had dark red marks. Each and every mark narrated the pain I had caused to both the brothers.
It was too little if compared to all the pain Dhruv had been bearing for years and Arnav had been bearing seeing his brother in that state.
Rubbing the bruised wrists, I walked downstairs to my room silently after I wiped away the tears.