Adelle kept her distance behind Ava, clutching her notebook like a holy scripture. She watched her ladyship strut through the dimly lit hallway of ExoShaneey Not Shady Club— a club so painfully tacky, it could cause early onset depression at first glance.
The walls were plastered with fake red velvet, the kind that looked luxurious if you were drunk enough or legally blind. Neon signs flickered half-heartedly — some letters already dying out so the whole name read:
EXOSHAN--Y
Like the club couldn't decide whether it wanted to be a K-pop shrine or a front for illegal Botox injections.
Ava walked like she was about to close a merger between Samsung and the dieties. Meanwhile, Adelle trailed behind like a walking anxiety disorder with employee benefits.
It was a historic day — the first time Adelle had ever seen Ava voluntarily walk into a scam. A scam obviously orchestrated by two criminals who committed tax fraud in the name of sisterhood — let's just call them Eva and Helen to protect their dumbass identities.
Adelle glanced at the fish mask no strapped tightly on Ava's face — custom-made, black sequined, limited edition. If the club's lighting hit it from the wrong angle, she looked like the final boss of an underwater heist movie.
The problem was...
Ava Summers could sniff out a fraudulent business proposal from a hundred miles away — but slap EXO on a piece of toilet paper and she would sell her own organs to the black market without asking a single question.
"Do you think..." Adelle whispered nervously, "...they're actually affiliated with EXO?"
Ava stopped mid-stride, slowly turning her head like she was about to commit corporate homicide.
"...If Byun Baekhyun himself isn't in this club by the end of the night, Adelle... I will personally buy this establishment... and burn it to the ground."
Adelle silently noted down:
LadyAva (casually planning arson) — 8:14 PM.
Two bulky guards led them to the West Wing VIP Room — which, judging by the smell alone, was either used for illegal poker tournaments or to hide bodies during tax season.
The room was bathed in purple LED lights, trying so hard to look luxurious but failing miserably. There were three glasses of champagne already poured on the table —
Rule number one in scams: If the drinks are already served before you arrive... You're about to wake up in an ice bath without a kidney.
Adelle stared at the champagne.
The champagne stared back.
Ava walked in without hesitation like she was about to negotiate a billion-dollar contract. Adelle shuffled in behind her like she was writing her own missing person report in real time.
A bucket of ice sat on the table. Three glasses. A single ashtray shaped like a dolphin — which was a very concerning aesthetic choice.
Adelle scribbled down: Possible money laundering dolphin cult — 8:15 PM.
Ava's sharp gaze swept across the room, calculating, sitting down the surprisingly clean velvet couch.
No sign of EXO.
No mysterious K-pop oppas.
Not even a faint sound of "Love Shot" playing in the background.
Ava narrowed her eyes.
Adelle prayed silently to every saint she knew.
"My lady..." Adelle whispered cautiously. "What are the chances that this is actually... a pyramid scheme?"
Ava's lips curled into a slow, dangerous smile beneath her fish mask.
"If it is..." she whispered back, voice colder than the champagne bucket— "...then I'm climbing straight to the top."
Adelle immediately jotted down: Lady Ava (accepting a career in illegal cosmetics) — 8:16 PM.
Just then, the door creaked open.
Adelle stiffened.
A man walked in.
He looked like the human embodiment of the word lawsuit — skinny, sunglasses indoors, floral shirt unbuttoned halfway down his chest like he was about to sell either fake gold chains or unregistered birth control pills.
He dropped a suspicious black briefcase on the table with a loud thud.
Ava didn't even blink.
Adelle had already composed three different versions of her last will and testament.
The man leaned in dramatically. "You... are Ava Summers?"
Ava tilted her head slowly, the sequins on her mask catching the purple lights like she was the final boss of a Yakuza side quest.
"Who's asking?"
The man smirked. "They call me... Mr. Q."
Adelle's pen snapped in half: Mr. Q (absolutely not his real name) — 8:18 PM.
"And how are you related to EXO?"
"I know Byun Baekhyun's cousin's neighbor's... cat."
"Promising," Ava folded her arms. "And what exactly do you... offer, Mr. Q? Because this doesn't look like a professional setting for negotionations."
"Oh, this is better," Mr. Q's briefcase clicked open like he was about to offer the cure for cancer or a multi-level marketing membership for erectile dysfunction pills — there was no in-between.
Adelle held her breath like she was witnessing a drug deal in slow motion. The fish inside the aquarium would have crossed itself if it had hands.
With all the drama in the world, Mr. Q pulled out a thick stack of paper from the suitcase and slid it across the table, the way mob bosses do in movies before they ask you to kill a senator.
Ava's heart pounded.
This was it. The moment she had been waiting for her entire life. Maybe the heavens had finally heard her prayers.
Maybe — just maybe — Kim Junmyeon was about to personally invite her to EXO's secret underground concert where he would serenade her with "Baby Don't Cry" while feeding her grapes with his own two hands.
Ava's remaining two brain cells immediately started making wedding plans.
Venue: Baekhyun's abs.
Theme: Chen singing OSTs live while D.O. judges everyone's life choices in the corner.
Dress code: Chanyeol. Just Chanyeol.
Adelle glanced at Ava and saw her ladyship's eyes sparkling beneath the fish mask like she was about to sell the entire Summers' family fortune in the name of EXO's discography.
"Please, Miss Summers." Mr. Q pushed the contract closer, voice low and mysterious. "Sign... and you will be granted exclusive access."
Ava's heart was screaming "EXO" louder than the entire MAMA 2017 fandom combined.
Her hands trembled as she reached for the papers.
Then —
Her ancestors themselves slapped her in the face with holy wisdom.
Ava blinked.
Once.
Twice.
Thrice.
Suddenly, the fog of EXO spell parted — just enough for one single, golden neuron to fire inside her malfunctioning brain.
She glanced down at the contract again.
Her vision swirled — the exposed alcohol in the room already doing the Lord's work without her even taking a sip and it makes her vision totally useless.
At first glance, the contract title glowed like Kai's abs wrapped in Gucci suits.
EXO VIP MEMBERSHIP CONTRACT
Ava's soul already ascended halfway to heaven— YES! THIS IS BETTER!
But when she blinked harder — the letters shifted like a cursed ancient text.
Her eyes landed on the fine print:
Marriage.
BirthrightTransfer.
BusinessTransfer.
Firstborn Transfer.
Ava blinked harder.
She squinted so hard her eyelids were about to file for divorce. At the very bottom of the contract... written in bold, black marker — the kind you buy in packs of ten at the dollar store —
EXO
It was underlined.
Twice.
With a tiny smiley face drawn beside it.
Ava's entire soul short-circuited. Her brain had officially blue-screened.
"...This is... an EXO membership contract?" she asked slowly, voice wobbling between thirst and suspicion.
Mr. Q smiled like a man who definitely committed at least three different types of insurance fraud before breakfast.
"Yes, Miss Summers. Very exclusive."
Ava leaned forward, trying to focus her spiraling vision.
"I see... so if I sign this, I get VIP tickets to... EXO's private concert?"
Mr. Q's smile widened. "Among other... privileges."
Ava's pupils dilated like a crack addict at a pharmacy sale she literally forgot about BELA Entertainment and EXO wearing her eco-friendly clothing line.
The fish in the aquarium swam in frantic little circles, ready to witness the first woman in history to sell her own family's entire business empire for three seconds of eye contact with Kim Junmyeon.
Ava's hand hovered dangerously close to the pen.
"...Kim Junmyeon will be there?"
"Absolutely," Mr. Q lied so effortlessly that even Satan would have taken notes.
"...Baekhyun?"
"Of course."
"...Chanyeol?"
Mr. Q's smile flickered — probably because Chanyeol was currently in the military — but this man was a certified scammer by blood.
"Front row."
Ava's fingers twitch-twitched-twitched toward the pen.
Adelle saw her entire career, her retirement fund, and her future grandkids' private school tuition flash before her eyes.
"My lady, WAIT—"
Ava snatched the pen like she was about to sign a soul contract with the devil himself. Adelle launched across the table like a medieval knight.
The pen scratched the paper —
One single letter.
A—
"MY LADY, KAI HAS A GIRLFRIEND!"
Ava froze. The pen dangled mid-air. The room descended into biblical silence.
Even Mr. Q's sunglasses slid down an inch.
Ava's head slowly... painfully... turned toward Adelle like the final boss of SM Entertainment's legal department.
Adelle's soul vacated her body on the spot.
"I-I mean," she stammered, "t-that's what they said... b-but it could be a rumor... d-dispatch... maybe...?"
Ava's fish mask tilted slightly. "Kim Jongin... has... a girlfriend?"
Adelle could hear the soundtrack of EXO disbandment conspiracy theories playing in the background.
"A-A possible girlfriend...?"
Ava's grip on the pen tightened like she was about to summon a lawsuit straight out of the Ninth Circle of Hell.
Adelle gulped. "And Baekhyun... just released a... bubble message... saying... he doesn't like fish masks...?"
Ava slowly set the pen down. Adelle could have sworn the purple LED lights flickered.
Mr. Q's smile wavered — probably calculating if he could still scam them into investing in vegan cryptocurrency instead—while doing the work of Helen's obviously failing plans because Eva couldn't afford to pay for luxurious clubs because Lord Flynn froze her cards.
Ava leaned back like she was about to buy this entire club, fire everyone inside, and turn it into a pet grooming salon for alpacas out of pure spite.
Her voice came out low and deadly:
"I don't sign contracts without... legal consultation."
Adelle scribbled down: Lady Ava (law-abiding citizen — barely) — 8:23 PM.
Mr. Q's forehead glistened under the neon lights.
Ava slowly rose from her seat.
The fish mask sparkled.
"I'll see myself out."
Mr. Q swallowed.
Adelle followed her ladyship with the speed of a woman who had just saved the Summers family empire from getting turned into a K-pop fanclub membership fee.
As they walked out of the room, Ava paused at the door.
Her voice echoed through the hallway:
"Tell Byun Baekhyun's cousin's neighbor's cat...
...I'll see him in court."
The door slammed shut.
Adelle scribbled furiously: Lady Ava (Enemy of Fake Oppas, Tax Fraud Survivor, EXO's Legal Representative) — 8:24 PM.
They walked straight out of ExoShaneey Not Shady Club without looking back.
The fish in the aquarium watched them go — the only true witness to one of the greatest scams in history.
Eva's perfectly manicured nails tapped against the wall, her red lips twitching as she watched Ava march out of ExoShaneey Not Shady Club like she was the reincarnation of Kim Junmyeon's lawyer from hell.
Ava's men flanked her from both sides, their black suits gleaming under the flickering purple lights — a whole SWAT team escorting one woman in a fish mask like she was the president of SM Entertainment doing an undercover inspection.
"I thought you said it would work?" Eva hissed, barely moving her lips as if she was some secret spy and not... well, a desperate scammer with chronic older sister syndrome.
Helen sighed, massaging her temples like she's been dealing with Eva's half-baked villain plans since the Ming Dynasty.
"I told you, my lady... the plan would have worked if you could afford to hire a trustworthy-looking man and a luxurious place." Her eyes trailed across the questionable neon signs, the sticky floors, and the broken disco ball hanging from the ceiling like it was one power outage away from committing bank robbery.
"This entire club screams money laundering front for social media influencers."
Eva's eyes twitched. "Well, I'm sorry I don't have millions of dollars of my own private inheritance like a certain someone."
Helen ignored the jab. She was already halfway through filing her mental resignation letter for the day.
"But still," Helen muttered, glancing at Ava, who was currently pausing in front of the aquarium at the entrance to have a telepathic stare-down with the fish one last time, "Lady Ava didn't even bother reading the entire contract when EXO was mentioned. We can still use it."
Eva scoffed. "EXO and alcohol is her only weakness."
They both watched as Adelle practically dragged Ava by the fish mask towards the van like she was transporting a highly emotional hostage from a failed cult initiation.
"I swear to God, Helen, if it weren't for Adelle, she'd be in there right now selling the entire Summers' empire just to become Kim Junmyeon's personal footstool."
Helen's eyes glimmered. "You could always try hiring someone to kidnap Adelle."
Eva's head snapped towards her so fast her hair nearly slapped Helen in the face.
"You think I haven't tried?" she hissed.
Helen pursed her lips, already regretting the entire conversation.
Meanwhile, across the street, one of Ava's guards dramatically opened the van door like he was the head of the Presidential Security Group.
Ava stepped inside with the grace of a fallen CEO whose EXO membership dreams were crushed by capitalism and the lack of consumer protection laws.
The door shut.
The van drove off.
The only sound left behind was the sad, muffled sound of the aquarium filter gurgling like a dying chain smoker.
Eva gritted her teeth.
So close.
SO DAMN CLOSE.
Helen cleared her throat delicately.
"So... what's next, my lady?"
Eva's eye twitched again — probably trying to connect to Satan's Wi-Fi for further instructions.
"Plan B."
Helen blinked slowly. "Which is?"
Eva's voice dropped into the kind of whisper only tax fraud masterminds and women with chronic younger sister trauma could master.
"We... will finally weaponize alcohol."
Helen's blood ran cold. "You don't mean—"
Eva's smile sharpened. "Oh, I mean."
A heavy silence fell between them.
Even the aquarium fish looked away like it didn't want to be an accomplice in this shit.
Helen's hands trembled slightly as she slowly pulled out her battered old notebook from her handbag — the one filled with notes on every single person Lady Ava Summers had ever blocked on Instagram since 2010.
"Wow, Helen! The loyalty to me," Eva grumbled the moment she saw Helen's notebook solely filled with Ava's information
"It's only to help you with your bull—" Helen swallowed her words. "We better go, my lady."