Chapter Ten:
"Of Etiquette and Identity."
Several days had passed since Resena's birthday party and now she was finally beginning her preparations for the wedding. Julius hired a charm and etiquette instructor to help Resena prepare. As she sat in the grand room, Resena began to feel anxious thinking back on the conversation she and Julius had the day after the party.
"You want me to take to charm classes?" Resena asked as she stuffed her mouth with more pasta.
That Sunday, Resena woke up late after spending time with Julius until the early morning. Now, they were enjoying a late lunch in the courtyard.
"I think it would be good for you. Now that we're officially engaged, you're going to have to interact with high society. You'll be invited to gatherings, tea parties, etc. This way you won't feel out of place."
Resena processed what Julius was saying as she ate. It was true, she did often feel out of place when speaking with nobles and the upper class, and although she was well versed in literature and languages from the many books, she would read at the Lanster Estate, she has no expertise in the subject of proper etiquette.
Smiling. "I think that is wonderful idea."
"Then it's settled. I have a tutor hired for you at once."
Bellman walked into the grand room as Resena stared out the window.
"My lady, Mrs. Catherine Rouleau is here."
Resena immediately stood up; Julius informed her of the instructor he'd hired to help with her training. Catherine Rouleau was one of the empire's most prominent etiquette instructors. Het training consisted of clients from the imperial palace itself, so Julius was sure she would be the best to coach Resena.
"I'm ready." Resena nodded to Bellman nervously.
"Don't fret my lady, I am confident you will do well." Bellman smiled at Resena bringing ease to her inner thoughts as she waited for Catherine to enter the room.
"Mrs. Rouleau, may I present the young mistress, Ms. Resena Balckwell."
Catherine stared at Resena for a few moments before she began to speak.
"Well, the rumors are most certainly true; you are absolutely beautiful."
Blushing. "Thank you, Mrs. Rouleau. I appreciate that compliment coming from someone such as yourself."
Resena bowed her head in curtsey just as Carla and Sabrina taught her that morning. Smiling, Catherine began to walk towards Resena will a look of assessment on her face.
"Let's see, you have good posture, but it could use some improvement. Very nice curtsey, and good voice tone. Tell me child, have you had any training at all?"
"I'm afraid I haven't since I was a small child."
"I see." Catherine walked a full circle around Resena before looking at her directly. Resena could feel the goosebumps on her arms and neck rise up.
"All in all, you're not completely dreadful. The main focus will be to raise your confidence. Julius informed me a little about your background these past few years, you have deepest sympathy. However, you are now a young woman of high society, one who is marrying one of this country's most eligible bachelors. All of society will be wondering why he chose you. Many of the young women will be wondering if that choice was adequate. We mustn't give them reason for pause."
Resena could feel her eyes began to water, it was true, many people would begin to wonder why someone as magnificent as Julius would choose her as his bride. Fear began to creep in her mind. Was she good enough for him? This was a question that stirred inside her everyday from the moment he'd asked her to marry him. Catherine could see Resena's face begin to fall.
"None of that my dear. You are a Blackwell, one who's parents were the cornerstones of this great nation! By the time I am finished with you, everyone will be wondering why you are not marrying the crown prince himself!"
Catherine's words jolted Resena. Was she really that good? Resena could not help but smile and laugh as Catherine made her proclamation.
"That! That will be your signature smile and laugh! That is what you will use to captivate your audience! Very beautiful!"
Resena listened on as Catherine went over outline of their training for the next several weeks. Each week they would work on a different course from speech etiquette to table and dining. Catherine also made suggestions regarding her dressing and outings.
"You must get into the habit of dressing a bit more extravagant. And you must start going out more, the public should see more of you before the wedding, so they are aware of who you are BEFORE you become Duchess Spencer. We'll need to give you and identity that all the kingdom will know you by."
"An identity?" Resena stood in confusion, exactly what was her identity? After so many years of living with her aunt and cousin, she'd begun to think it was one of uselessness.
"Absolutely. Take your parents for example. Dr. Blackwell was known as 'the gifted hands'; and your mother was known as 'the golden saint'. These were their identities, and when anyone would come across them, they would immediately know who they were and what they stood for!"
Smiling thoughtfully, Resena began to think of her parents. Would she truly be able to have an identity of her own? The thought pandered through her mind well into the evening as she sat with Julius for dinner.
"So, how did your first day of charm classes go?" Julius' question immediately snapped Resena out of her thoughts.
"It went quite actually. Mrs. Rouleau is a wonderful instructor, thank you for hiring her for me."
Julius could sense something was troubling Resena.
"Are you sure? Did anything unusual happen?"
"No, why do you ask?"
"Well, you look as if something may be troubling you. If anything happened today that made you feel uncomfortable, please let me…"
Resena held her hands up in defense. Sometimes Julius could be a little overprotective.
"That's not it at all. I was just wondering what my-" Resena suddenly stopped. How could she explain to Julius what was concerning her about her identity. Someone like him, a person who has always known who he is where he stands in the world. Would he understand what she was concerned about?
Julius looked on puzzled. "Wonder what?"
Resena took a deep breath, "I might as well tell him. He'll worry if I don't."
"I was wondering what my identity is."
"Your identity?"
"Yes, Mrs. Rouleau spoke of creating one for myself. Something I would be known for in society. I'm just wondering what it is"
Smiling, Julius began to speak. "Well, what would you like it to be?"
Smiling, Resena tilted her head down. Therein lied the issue, she wasn't exactly sure what she wanted to be known for.
"I honestly don't know. I've never given thought to what type of person I would be as an adult. For so long my aunt convinced me I was worthless."
Julius could feel himself get agitated. The nerve of the Lanster's making her feel worthless. Julius knew he would have to find a way to make the Lanster's pay for what they did to Resena. Years of mental and physical abuse would be hard to overcome. Smiling he placed his hand on hers.
"Resena, look at me. You're not nor have you ever been worthless. I'm sorry that family always made you feel this way. I promise you; you're already an amazing person even without some special identity. When the time comes, you'll know what type of mark you want to make on the world."
Resena lifted her head dawning the brightest smile. Julius became startled, there that smile was again. Though he'd seen numerous times, it still managed to shock him. Julius could feel his hands pull Resena close to his face. Unable to stop himself, he grew closer. Resena looked on in shock and immediately closed her eyes tight. Julius had not kissed her since the party, though she often had desires that he would. Placing his lips on hers, he could smell the sweet sent coming from her neck. Resena was intoxicating, he could feel himself panting and kissing her more passionately.
"I can barley breath." Resena thought as she and Julius continued their lip tango. Suddenly, Julius pulled his lips away from hers. "If I keep going, I won't be able to stop." As they gazed into each other's eyes, Julius' communicator began to buzz. Startling them both, he clumsily pushed the talk button.
"Spencer."
"Yo, it's Raymon. Got time to talk, this is important."
"Give me a few moments." Julius looked at Resena who's face was flushed in crimson red. Gently touching her cheek, Julius smiled.
"I'm sorry, I have to take this in the study, do you mind if we talk more later?"
"O-Of course. No worries." Resena answered nervously. In truth, she was glad the interruption occurred. As Julius made his way to the study, Resena began to clean up. Just then, Helga, one of the kitchen maids, made her way to the table.
"Oh, Lady Resena, I have that! Please leave that on the table."
Smiling. "I'm sorry. I'm still not completely used to people waiting on me. Yes, of course, I'll you to it."
Smiling. "No problem at all! You're always so amazing Ms. Resena, thank you!"
Resena could not help but smile, the staff at the Spencer estate was so different than the ones at Lanster. There were no worries of being fired due to communicating or helping her. The staff all loved working for Julius, and he treated them all like family. Being in the environment was such a breath of fresh air for both her and Carla. Resena decided to speak with Carla and Sabrina soon, she had new feeling growing inside of her and she did not know what they meant. For now, however, she would think about the type of person she would like to be moving forward.
"Good afternoon, Lady Resena, I trust you had a pleasant evening?"
Catherine Rouleau smiled from across the room as Resena made her to her chair in the dining hall. Today they would be practicing table etiquette.
"Yes, as a matter of fact I did. Thank you so much for asking."
"Very good. Today we will be practicing proper table etiquette. Knowing how to sit at a table, what proper utensils to use and what type of table conversation are essential in etiquette."
Resena's lessons carried on for over a week, and Catherine was very impressed with how fast she learned. Soon Resena would be ready to make her formal debut into society.
"Lady Resena, I can honestly say you are by far one of my best students! You learn and adapt so quickly. You'll be ready to host your own gatherings in no time!"
Resena's face grew flustered, she certainly was not ready to take on that challenge, still, she was pleased at how happy Mrs. Catherine was with her lessons.
"Now, we'll need to put all of this training into practice, there is an annual tea party coming up and I think this would be a great time to introduce to many of Lenora's most prominent women."
"Okay. I'm ready!" Resena could feel herself get charged up! Finally, she would be able to prove she was indeed worthy to stand by Julius not just o others but to herself as well.
"Excellent! This year, it will be hosted by Denise Schowder, the daughter of Duke Daron Schowder. She's very prominent and popular in high society, if you can befriend her, it will all but guarantee your rising into the inner circles."
Resena had heard of Denise Schowder many times from her aunt and cousin, Marsell was not particularly fond of her. Resena could not help but chuckle as she thought back to one evening.
"Ugh! I cannot stand her!" Marsell stormed into the kitchen one night after coming home from an engagement in the city. Larna came rushing in behind her.
"What happened darling? Did something go wrong at the luncheon?"
"Ugh! That little witch Denise tried to make a fool of me again! I cannot stand her!! I can't stand how everyone just fawns all over her."
"Pay her no mind darling. She's just as wretched as her mother. We'll have the last laugh in the end."
Resena chuckled quietly, "she can't be all that bad if my aunt and cousin dislike her", Resena began to feel excited, maybe she could make some friends at the tea party.
"I'll do my best Mrs. Rouleau. I also think I know what type of identity I want to have."