"I am Professor Felix Sinclair," she wrote down without really clarifying any of what had happened before. The majority of the students were confused, but there was this vague sense of agreement amongst everyone with regards to the Professor knowing what she was doing.
"Yes. It is true that your desire greatly influences your output. But what about Desire itself? What impacts our core beliefs? Are we not all living beings? We all hold beliefs throughout our lives, thousands upon thousands, eventually forming a belief system. Which, similar to your mana core, is conceptual in nature."
She was referring to a mental or psychological structure that aided in mental shortcuts or filled in blanks throughout daily life. This could extend from the smallest of examples to the largest, and it would still be true.
"You're told the greater your desire, the better. Meaning there's a quantitative variable involved. But how exactly do we quantify something as vague as desire?" Felix looked around, making sure everybody was following along with the conversation.
"Truth is we don't. There is no objective method through which we can quantify desire. After all, much like our mana core and circuits, this too is conceptual." A soft and understanding smile spread across her face.
"The Magical Being. It refers to me, you, us, every single person who is capable of magic." She summoned a tiny fire above her pinky finger and instantly dematerialized it. "What's so interesting is, even within the label 'magical' we are reminded of the superficial position magic has. It seems and feels superimposed upon us, no?"
"Nevertheless, the words magical and being are at opposing ends with each other. And yet, here we are, in defiance of our very own understanding. Some could say magic is in itself a contradiction to civilized and modern society. Does any of this matter to us? Not really, not right now. Is it good to know anyway? Absolutely." She grinned while putting her thumb up.
The class was divided into many subsections. There were aspects heavily grounded in physiology, this mainly included information regarding the mana core and mana circuits. Next was the psychological variables; this included a broader array of variables, mainly to do with ontological questions with regards to magic. The other subsections weren't yet introduced, but Dio was hopeful and eager.
"Your desire is not as simple as feeling and visualizing. It is influenced by your Belief system, so if there's any part of you that disagrees with your desire or belief, then the strength is reduced, thus impacting your desire. Unfortunately, it isn't always as simple as this. There's a clear lack of research in this field, and we can only ever study what we discovered and know,"
"Your emotions and contextual value are extremely important in the determining of your abilities. There are moments of rage where you may feel as if your blood is replaced by mana. Vengeance, regret, sorrow. All strong emotions allow you to break your limits. There are methods to reel these emotions back into control, but the first and most important step begins with awareness and acceptance,"
"I know, I know. It seems stupid and minute. However, by taking the first step and acknowledging your emotions, you now hold the cards. No part of you can be surprised by these feelings, which reduces how overwhelming it can get,"
'This feels more like therapy than a class to be honest,' Dio jested in his head. He knew better than anyone the importance of thought and the mind in relation to magic. Perhaps that was why he considered her words more than the others. Moreover, his attendance of the course Mind and Magic drastically impacted how receptive he was during Felix's class.
"It may seem unbelievable, but I've seen the literal spell begin to shake due to the caster's anxiety. The concept is pretty straightforward: Emotions on their own don't cause anything. Rather, it is their impact on your mental state that you should be cautious of,"
"Your mental state is everything. It determines how capable you are of retrieving information and even aids in stable perception. The Magical Being is more than just magical, you know," she snickered and used a hand to cover her laugh. Felix knew very well how the course content came off.
It was similar to other discourse-heavy courses, they weren't exclusively grounded in empirical data. However, the value of the content came from living proof. The teachers themselves were an embodiment of everything they taught. The only true path is to relentlessly and unyieldingly pursue the journey of Self.
"Hey….can we talk?" Alex whispered to Dio once the class had gotten over. However, before Dio could even nod, the Professor interjected, "I'm sorry to do this but could I borrow him for a bit?"
"Mmhmh," Alex nodded vigorously. She was rather intimidated by Felix.
Once the classroom was empty, she uttered a word that Dio knew all too well. It was one of the first few spells he'd ever witnessed.
"Veil," a translucent slime like coating materialized over the room.
"Uh….what..is the meaning of thi-"
At this point, people enjoyed cutting him off. It was so often that he was interrupted by someone trying to prove a point. Originally, Dio planned on asking John what he saw. However, that was no longer needed. He found himself in exactly the same vision as John, except it seemed more aggressive.
"I know when an Ego is about to lose control," her voice echoed, it felt like it came from every direction.
".....what..?" he uttered, shutting his eyes close as he focused on stabilizing his mental world. It was her own words. Anxiety and other emotions were capable of impacting him. Then wouldn't the first step be to try that?
Sure enough, he took a few deep breaths and could feel the world slow down. Things weren't moving anymore as he looked at Felix who stared at him intently. "You pick things up quick," she said in a clear and clean voice.
"Dio Aethereus. I don't know if it is because of your name, but you have an Ego too strong for your own good. If things don't change…there's a good chance you lose yourself…." She spoke in a solemn voice, clearly hinting at something that Dio had no idea about.