Some kind of supernatural doomsday clock? As far as tricks go, convincing royalty that the end of the world is nigh is *definitely* a pastime of some of the fey I was warned of. But even I had to admit…
In my old life, I'd encountered many strange and powerful magics - but nothing quite like this. The mechanical quality to its messaging especially caught my doubt… like something out of the science fiction novels Helene had sometimes snuck from the city library as a very 'disobedient' pup.
> Apparently even a backwoods pack member could learn a thing or two, given the right motivation. It's a shame she let their rules bully her into submission as she grew. <
As someone who fought tooth and claw to work around my own gilded cage, I really do feel sorry for her. But, she's gone. It's not like I can befriend and teach her my stubborn ways.
I tried to open what I was seeing to my wolf, though it made even less sense of it than me. When I grew tired of the same message, this 'system' reacted to my intentions quickly enough. The timer faded back to its glyph and to the edge of my sight.
One by one, I drifted to more elements of the interface.
A map was immediately the most useful for me right now, as I had no idea where I even was. I decided I would come back to it. It had another clock that looked to be the current time and gave me way more information than I wanted to deal with right now.
A check mark was next. What seemed like a list of ---- lines that I assume was meant to serve some purpose. I tried focusing on it, but staring at them resolved nothing… other than that it did make me not want to look at the dash ever again.
A cube shape turned into a grid. Each empty square was just as useless to me as the list. Though the zeroes in each corner told me it might be for counting… something. Almost as annoying!
"I hate mysteries."
And finally came a leafless, upside down tree. It seemed the least similar to its result than the others. Though unlike them, it actually told me what it was at the top with text. A 'pack roster'.
I didn't really understand why, but it was empty. Mostly. Am I actually not counted as part of the Duskpaw by this entity? Yet there is a listing for Helene and… one other.
But that one extra entry immediately drew my eyes. With an unease edging into my heart.
???
Unlike the rest of the 'system'... this took on a somehow ominous white hue to its text. I focused on it and a faint web of pale blue lines started to shimmer into existence. Leading downward from it, just like an upside down tree.
This linked the mysterious entry to two familiar names that faded in. I felt a chill run down my spine as realization dawned. This wasn't just a roster of pack members - it worked as a genealogy ledger. And that meant an unknown entry linked to | Helene | and | Jace |...
I looked down at my belly, still flat. But that physical assurance hardly meant anything if this was truly as recent as I fear.
> It couldn't be... could it? <
I stopped feeling the cold air… stopped moving at all as my mind rebelled against it. Helene's body was pregnant. With Jace's child. This body that is now my body, since I don't know how to leave it or go back.
The thought made me sick. So queasy that I jumped up and retched in a corner of the den. A visceral rejection of this additional forced reality.
I had already been struggling to come to terms with my transmigration. The potential loss of my old life in that world. My original identity being shoved into a new shape, a new compromise. Being a werewolf instead of a fox shifter.
But this... this was a violation on a whole other level. Now I was expected to bear the child of a man I had never asked for. A burden I never wanted?
Rage and disgust warred within me. The emotions were so human… and so Citra Lomdi. That helped to temper them after a long count to ten. What was left was only a bone-deep exhaustion I could almost feel even into my soul.
I couldn't deal with this. Not now. Not on top of everything else.
I laid as far inside as I could and closed my eyes with a hand over my face. But my racing thoughts would not quiet… would not calm.
Memories of Helene's life flooded my mind, almost unbidden. Her relationship with Jace piled up with more detail. A vivid picture of life in the Duskpaw pack was painted throughout.
They were a 'simple' people, living close to the land in rough-hewn cabins and tents scattered throughout the forest. Deeper than humans were expected to explore. Another way to say it was that they rejected civilization and progress.
The pack hunted together, bringing down prey to share in. That part was at least 'kind'. In the evenings, they would gather around bonfires to share stories and revel in the bonds of tradition.
Another part of their 'humanity' they kept, that. Unafraid to manipulate fire if it suited their needs. Something a lot of shifters in my world struggled with.
For Helene, those early days with Jace had been filled with a kind of rugged romance after growing up in that environment. He started the strong, silent type. A skilled hunter and a respected member of the pack.
She had been drawn to his intensity and understated confidence. When he had first shown interest in her, watching her more than others, she had felt like the luckiest girl in the world. The first mating made her sure of it.
She was so… sure.
But I could see the cracks in that idyllic facade even then. The way Jace would dismiss her ideas. Call her dreams foolish. The possessive grip of his hand on her arm, too tight to be considerate.
She didn't think much of those parts, but I do. The flashes of temper and the sullen silences that could last for days. That he would take that displeasure out on her instead of whoever else had ruined his day.
She might not have been punched until I got here, but she was his punching bag.
And then… the night they had conceived this child a week ago. Helene had been so… *so* eager. Desperate to please him while in the dazzling heat of her estrus.
She had thought that starting a family would bring them the closeness she craved. Would lock them further in their bond, like his painful knotting had locked them together.
But that copulatory tie had only stuck for twenty minutes after his fierce passion… before he got tired of assuring she'd get pregnant and forced her off. I can't 'feel' her unease from that - luckily I have no feelings at all of hers - but I know she had it.
Doubt. But it was vague. Almost subconscious.
Had she known then that something was wrong? That Jace… that her supposed fated mate's love was a fragile, conditional thing? Cruelty and casual disregard. Even the way he had lashed out at her… at ME… even knowing SHE might successfully carry his child this year!
A growl rose in my throat as my emotions rippled. I feel this body start to shift, though not into the hybrid form. My claws maul earth and root. Fangs snap down on air as I bolt from the too small enclosure before I'm trapped.
I'd almost forgotten that I had opened the door to our connection again. My anger was being echoed and fed back by the wolf inside me. Neither of us could sit still.
> You see now, don't you? He's not worthy of being a father. Not to this pup and not to any pup. He never was. <
I sent my thoughts to her wolf as I ran to get further away. I would not let that man anywhere near this child. No. I didn't care what their society expected or what their traditions demanded. Even if it meant defying every damn pack in this world.
I feel its attention sharpen with each word… each conviction my fox soul imparts. The wolf whined. I could feel its conflicted loyalties. But beneath that, I could feel a grudging agreement and respect for what I'd decided.
A vixen's instincts are no different than a she-wolf's when it comes to some things. To protect and nurture life growing within us. Whether any of this was my choice or not didn't matter. It's happening.
I'll deal with it. Alone.
> Jace was just a petty human in beast clothing. Being shepherded by a demon in plain sight. But I doubt they've ever dealt with a fox. <
My trail weaves and crosses as I double back and intentionally mark my scent to send any trackers on loops. Chad had put him up to everything lately. I'm sure of that. Jace had proven himself unworthy by falling for it.
Dangerous even.
It was hard not to feel like I should lecture the spirit creature for letting Helene get close to either of them. Even though I know it's not exactly its fault for her choices. For either of their actions.
But it was working so well and agreeing so much… and I had no one else to talk to.
> Stop being so cooperative you stupid wolf. I might start liking you. <
It barks and snaps at me and I start feeling better. First things first - I need to get out of this forest. Out of Duskpaw territory. I can't risk Jace or the others finding me.
Especially not in my current mental state, where I might readily attack instead of run. I need somewhere safe. Somewhere I can feel safe for more than an hour.
A place to plan my next move.