"Don't tell her what's going on."
"Don't tell her what's going on."
"Don't tell her what's going on."
I knew I wasn't in some sort of paradise. But why couldn't she know the truth? Was our fate truly inescapable? Or was our final moments to be so chilling it was better to not know? And how did Anne know?
I'd laid in bed all day yesterday. My stomach was painfully bloated, weighing me down. I still felt sick as I ate my breakfast. When we all finished the Mary came into the dining hall. The others left with the scarred man and Mary approached me. She wore a red latex dress. She helped me stand. Silently she guided me to an office on the top floor.
A tall, stocky woman was revealed. She wore a black suit and hoop earrings. Her grin revealed jagged metal in place of teeth. She sat at a wide desk atop a red rug. Lining the walls were pictures depicting slaughters I assumed the woman committed herself.
Mary helped me to stand before the desk. She kept one hand on my shoulder and the other on my elbow. Her thumb stroked my back. I looked down at her haunted eyes and I saw a silent plea. I looked back to the monster before me.
"Belle?"
"Yes."
"You're allowed ten minutes of socialization each day. Discussion of escape or violence will have you in solitary. Any threats or violence against our residents will have you in solitary. I've also been told you have an attitude problem. That's something that will have to be ironed out."
I opened my mouth to speak but discreetly Mary pressed against my bad leg, clouding my mind with agony and turning my body to stone. I gritted my teeth.
"Do not ask why you're here, ask for any special treatment, speak unless spoken to, try to escape, or disobey. Do you understand?"
I nodded once and the woman gave Mary a look. Mary guided me out of the office and to the second floor. She took me into her office where she checked my wounds. Then she brought me to the underground pool where I could shower in the dressing room.
I dropped my dress that Mary threw into the washing machine. As she did I stepped into the shower and squeezed soap into my hand. The lather filled the room with the scent of roses. The soap left my skin feeling refreshed. I breathed in the smell, soothing pleasure settling into my being. The shampoo on the other hand smelled like banana.
When I stepped out of the shower Mary was holding out a towel. I roughly dried my hair before moving on to my body. Then I took my dress back.
"Thank you."
"I appreciate you being polite to the leader."
With my arms crossed I looked her over. I couldn't read her expression, but that wasn't new.
"How did you join this group?"
"My husband joined them before the outbreak."
"What's he like?"
"He's a guard. He was always a very gruff man. He's hardworking, determined. I think you would have liked him."
"Have I met him?"
"No. He guards the main entrance during the day."
She motioned for me to follow her and we started out of the indoor pool.
"So, were you a doctor before the outbreak?"
She chuckled, "Testing if I'm just a fake? Yes. I studied pediatrics but we tend to know a fair amount in every field."
We passed through the double doors and ventured into the main hall. When we reached the stairs she secured her arm around me.
"I was a lawyer."
"What specialty?"
"Criminal law."
"I can see that for you. Do you miss it?"
"Yes. You?"
"Every day."
We ventured into the dining hall and I sat at the table. Before me was a roasted turkey atop a bed of greens. Beside it was a chocolate cake. A pitcher of lemonade sat on the other end beside a glass. I placed some meat and vegetables on the plate. Mary poured some gravy over the turkey and I took a bite.
"Where do you get all this food?"
"We have a little farm on the roof."
"Nice."
I took another bite, my gaze drifting to her. She stared at the turkey.
"Do you want some?"
She blinked away her thoughts, "Uh, no. Thank you."
"I can't finish it all."
"You have to."
"No one will know," I offered.
Mary paused. She turned her head to the door, then to me. She looked down at the animal. Eventually she pulled away a leg and doused it in gravy.
"Don't tell anyone, okay?"
"Of course."
I took in another mouthful. Despite her alliance I couldn't help but feel my stomach drop at the sight of her inhaling the rich meat in her hands, her gaze never leaving the door. When She finished she picked the bone clean.
When I finished my bowl I took a leg that Mary doused in gravy. When I finished the leg I downed my lemonade. I then tore away more meat. When the turkey was gone I finished the last of the lemonade. I already felt sick.
"Could you get me some water?" I asked, attempting to not sound too polite.
"Of course."
When she stood to walk away I risked a glance at the door before I shoved two bones into my bandage. Hot pain spread through my arm but I gritted my teeth and forced the bones inside.
When Mary returned I was cutting the cake in half with a plastic knife, being sure to angle my wrist away from her sight. She set the water before me.
"You want some cake?"
She bit her lip, her far away eyes staring through the chocolate hungrily.
I leaned forward on my elbows, silently diverting her attention to me, "Whether I die or not I can't hurt you. You've been so kind. Besides, they wouldn't believe me."
Carefully she took a piece of cake for herself and I did the same. We finished our meal in silence. I wanted to help her clean but I felt an overwhelming urge to vomit. I laid back and closed my eyes, my hands on my lap. Feeling this intense sickness my mind wandered to Alex. I could see him taking care of me, letting me rest my head on his lap while he played with my hair, then carrying me to bed.
The memories of Angela were different. When we were younger we'd have movie night every Friday. She'd spend all evening making homemade hamburgers, cake, cookies, and ice cream. Before I got home she'd run to the store to grab all the candy we could afford. Once I was home we'd huddle under a blanket, or king's feast on the coffee table before us, and eat while we watched horror movies. Saturday morning was always painful. We'd communicate in groans and whines.
Feeling the memories I found myself smiling despite the horror looming over me. Eventually I wiped my eyes and stood on shaking legs. Mary rushed to help me steady myself. She guided me to the couch at the far end of the room. I laid down and she sat in the armchair beside me after sliding a CD into the old DVD player. My eyes watered again.
"What's wrong?"
"My sister and I watched this movie together a while ago. When she could legally drink. She wanted to spend her birthday with me so she got the junk food while I made margaritas. The next day we laid on the couch together in the dark."
"Should I turn it off?" She asked tentatively.
"It's alright. I think you'd like it," I said as the title showed, "Do you have any family?"
"No. No one but Matthew."
"You have a friend," I smiled at her, though the expression she returned was tinged in pain.