Six years earlier
We made it home but not in time. Alpha Greg was waiting for us by the balcony. He had his cigar and a glass of whiskey.
He wasn't a heavy smoker. He only smoked when Ainsley was out of town.
We pushed past the front, still giggling like a pack of twelve year old girls, only stopping when we can face to face with Greg. And just like that, our 'happy' was gone, replaced by his suffocating presence.
"Good evening, sir" I murmured immediately and kept my eyes down. I wasn't allowed to look him in the eyes and it was alright with me. I didn't want to look at him anyway.
"Where have you been?" He asked us.
"Out" Ryder answered and stepped in front of me like he always did whenever he smelt trouble.
Greg's eyes stayed on me. It made me very uncomfortable.
"I finished most of the chores, sir. I will get right to the others right now"
I tried to leave but Ryder's hand went around mine. "It's my fault. Be mad at me not her"
"I'm not mad" Greg laughed and took a step back. "Kaidaira go change out of the wet clothes and come here for a second. I made dinner, we should eat"
I hesitated. His kindness was off putting.
"Go" Ryder nudged me and I scurried off but not before I heard the conversation between them.
I hid behind the back door, and I listened to them talk.
"Damn, she's pretty" Greg commented. "Certainly fuckable. Have you tasted her yet?"
I felt sick to the stomach. My heart rose and fell softly as I tried to not give away my position.
"Don't talk about her that way" Ryder whispered.
"What way?" Greg asked him.
"Like she's a fucking object!"
I wanted to reach out and beg him to lower his voice, I didn't want him to get on Greg's bad side because of me.
"So, you haven't fucked her yet" Greg laughed mockingly at him. "Can you even get it up? Are you man enough? Or you are an invalid. Are you an invalid?" .
Greg was a dick. Always trying to Garner a response from his own fucking son, if I had a knife I would plunge it into his heart and twist it for saying such vile things to a sweet boy like Ryder.
"Answer me, boy!" He yelled at him but Ryder kept quiet.
After a few seconds, he said. "Go change out of your wet clothes and come down for dinner. Afterwards, we are going to have the talk. I will give you some points or maybe draw you a fucking map on how to find a woman's hole"
"Fuck you!" Ryder screamed at him. I held my breath because I knew it was coming. The sound of his palm on Ryder's face. A yelp escape from his mouth and without thinking I pushed the door open and rushed inside.
"Ryder!"
I was scared of the damage he had inflicted on the boy I loved.
"Ryder!"
"I'm okay" he whispered and spat out blood. "I'm okay. Dad and I were having a conversation. Come on, go change out of the wet clothes. Come on, Kai"
We started walking towards our rooms. It was opposite each other…it wasn't like they could make it easier for us to sneak into each other's room…if one day, they walk home and see us fucking in the living room, they wouldn't be surprised. They would close the door and wait outside for us to finish…best fucking parents of the year!
We walked towards our bedroom, Ryder's face was blank. We walked in silence till we got to the hallway.
"Go change. Take a shower and meet me her in 15 minutes. Let's take another crack on homeschooling, okay?"
He didn't wait for me to say anything when he opened his door and walked inside…I stood there for a minute, lost in thought.
After a few minutes, I pushed the door of his bedroom open and walked inside. He was half naked, only wearing his pants, his shirt was on the floor.
"Are you alright? Are you hurt?" He asked me and came closer like he wanted to make sure that his demonic father didn't hurt me.
I took a deep breath and I said it.
"Make love to me" I blurted out.
"What?" He sounded confused. His eyes told me as much as it pulled together like he was finding it difficult to concentrate.
I didn't say it with words again. I simply unzipped my dress and let it fall to the floor.
I stepped away from the muddy dress in my hello kitty yellow underwear and no bra, found it too constricting.
I stood in front of him, practically naked, briefly I wondered what he thought of me.
Did he like me even a little bit or was the very sight of me repulsive to him?
My chest rose and fell softly.
"Ryder" I whispered when he stood there staring at me without saying anything. "Don't just stand there. Say something"
I had complicated emotions about it. But I held my breath in anticipation. "I reckoned I should have taken a shower before we did this but…"
"No"
"What?"
I wanted to die. Right there on the spot where I stood in my yellow hello kitty panties and my little teardrop boob on display for his wandering eyes, I wanted to die.
"Okay" I hurriedly stepped into my discarded dress and pulled it up and I fought what was an onset of ugly cry as I hurriedly dressed myself. "Sorry, I was just trying to " I murmured and started zipping my dress.
What was I trying to do?
"Kai…"
"Forgive me, I don't know what I was thinking"
"Kai"
"I will leave you be. Please if your father asks again, tell him we did it. I don't want him to think I have outlived my usefulness. Catch your fun with Lesley or Crystal or whatever the name of the educated purebred free she-wolves you have in your fancy highschool but just tell Greg that you touched me. Spare me that shame, okay?" I murmured and fought back the tears as I turned around to walk towards the door.
"Kaidaira!" He screamed and I stopped in my tracks.
I didn't want him to scream, the whole household would hear…everyone would know.
So, I stopped so he doesn't have to yell anymore.
There was a moment of deafening silence before he took this breath, it was heavy and it had so many meanings.
"If you have anything to say, could you say it when I'm not so… vulnerable. Can you…"
"I love you" He forced out.