"Is this real life? Or am I stuck inside some kind of weird prank show?" I muttered under my breath, staring at the man in the black suit who stood before me with a calm, unbothered smile.
"I haven't even graduated yet! I can't keep a cactus alive, and you're telling me I'm getting married? Bro, is this a setup?" I turned to the guy beside me, hoping someone anyone would laugh and end the joke.
But no. The man just adjusted his tie and replied, "This is a legal ceremony. You are the groom in our 100th wedding celebration. Congratulations, sir."
100th. Freaking. Wedding.
My knees went weak. "My parents are going to bury me alive," I mumbled. "I can already hear my mom's sandal flying toward my face."
Desperate, I turned to the girl beside me the same mysterious girl from the canal. She looked equally stunned, like she'd accidentally walked into a fever dream. "Hey," I whispered. "You're not into this either, right?"
She nodded frantically. "Obviously not!"
We both tried to plead our case. "Please, let us go," I begged. "Take my kidney, take my phone, take my college debt just don't make me a husband!"
"I'll give you whatever you want," the girl added. "Just undo this madness!"
But the crowd was already celebrating. A priest appeared out of nowhere like this was some kind of bizarre game show. "Let's begin," he said with a smile.
Before I could blink twice, papers were signed, vows were mumbled, rings were slipped on fingers and boom. Married.
They shoved us into a dimly lit wedding suite that smelled like roses and regret. I sank into a corner of the room, hugging my knees like a traumatized toddler.
"What just happened?" I whispered to no one. "I've never even held a girl's hand seriously, and now I'm a full-blown husband?"
Then I heard it. Laughter.
Not the comforting kind. Not the romantic kind either.
She was laughing at me.
"You look like someone just stole your puppy," she said between chuckles.
I turned to her, offended and exhausted. "Did you plan this? Is this all some prank you pulled with your mafia cousins?"
"Please," she snorted. "Like I'd choose to marry a mess like you. You wish."
Ouch. That one hurt. But hey, at least she was honest.
"So what now?" I asked, throwing my hands up.
She crossed her arms. "You're the husband. You figure it out."
I blinked. "What excuse me?"
"I'm just saying," she shrugged, "you signed the paper. You're legally bound now. Guess you're stuck with me."
It was too much. I blacked out.
No joke. Just passed out from mental overload.
Next morning, we were literally kicked out. Not symbolically. A guy in a suit pushed us out with a boot.
She turned to me and said, "So… you got a place, husband?"
I stared at her. "You're joking, right?"
She raised an eyebrow. "Nope. You're responsible for me now."
I wanted to scream. But then an idea hit me like a blessing from above.
"My uncle's old house," I said. "Moonlit Garden. He's overseas, and no one lives there. We can stay there."
She nodded without protest.
The place looked like it had been abandoned for years. Dust, spiderwebs, broken tiles. A haunted vibe, honestly.
"Nice house," she commented, looking around.
I rolled my eyes. "Correction. Not mine. It belongs to my uncle. He was a politician. Got caught laundering money and ran off to some other country."
She burst into laughter. "Wow. That explains the vibe."
We spent the rest of the day cleaning. It was surprisingly peaceful, almost like a bonding experience except I still didn't know her name.
When the place finally looked liveable, she dropped a bombshell while sipping juice on the old couch. "By the way, I can't cook. And I'm terrified of staying here alone."
I nearly choked. "What?!"
She added sweetly, "So you'll need to stay here with me. You can cook, clean, protect me from ghosts husband duties, you know?"
I stared at her. "I have college."
"Then drop out."
"What?!"
"I'm kidding," she smirked. "Sort of."
I held my head in my hands. "This is why I avoided relationships. Drama. So much drama."
She grinned. "Too late now."
Eventually, I agreed to go home and grab some stuff. But as we approached my neighborhood, I spotted the worst thing possible Li-wei and Min-jun. My partners-in-crime.
"YOU!" I roared, charging at them.
Min-jun tried to escape, but I tackled him. "You ruined my life!"
Li-wei looked genuinely concerned. "Did they drug him or something?"
"I wish they did," I muttered. "That would've been better."
They tried to calm me down, but I was a mess. "Don't worry," I said finally. "I'll be back in college. Someday. Probably."
At home, my mom greeted me with a stick. Classic.
"Where were you?" WHACK. "I called 47 times!" WHACK.
"I was studying!" I lied. "At Min-jun's place!"
"Studying? Then why are your grades trash?" she snapped.
I sighed. "I'm moving out. Uncle Min-woo's house. It's closer to tuition. I'll focus better."
She narrowed her eyes. "You better."
I nodded solemnly. "You have my word."
I packed quickly and left. Back at Moonlit Garden, the place felt different now. Like something had changed.
I wasn't alone anymore.
And I didn't even know her name.
Meanwhile, in a distant village called Changsha...
A man was roaming the streets with a photograph in hand.
"Have you seen this girl?" he asked.
An old woman squinted at the photo. "I saw her last night... at the bus stop."
His eyes narrowed.
"Found you," he whispered.
End of Chapter 2