Sirius you need to stop saying that word..." James groaned as he watched Lily Evans harrumph, pick up her homework, and walk away from our area in the common room with a disgruntled expression on her face.
"What word?" I questioned, idly scribbling down nonsense on the parchment before me.
Slughorn had asked us to give him a step-by-step process to creating some potion of sorts.
So, naturally, I was giving him a step-by-step on how to create a Dark Lord.
Step one, tell him he can split his soul seven times.
I was really looking forward to his feedback.
Was it on the nose? Maybe. Did I care? Not one bit.
"..." James Potter stared at me somewhat uncomfortably before whispering the aforementioned slur.
I blinked in response. "What's wrong with mudblood?" I questioned out loud, earning a wince from the other. It's a freakin' term of endearment!
"...How!?" He questioned in response.
I sheepishly grinned at him. "Heard that did you?"
"Seriously, how is it a term of endearment?"
Before I could answer, nearly everyone in the common room joined in asking, somewhat more accusingly than the Potter heir.
I shrugged and wrote down step two.
"Purebloods loved muggle-borns so much they gave them a nickname? Shorter one even, to make it easier for the kids to learn it."
James Potter just stared at me for a moment before his gaze lowered itself towards the aforementioned step two on my parchment.
'Convince the headmaster not to give the desperate lunatic a job.'
After all, if there's anything I've learned about Dumbles, it's that he loved to keep dangerous shit near him at all times. He should've jumped at the chance to have Riddle under direct supervision.
"Dumbledore?-" James Potter shook his head. "Look. That's not why they-"
"Us, James, we're the Purebloods in question-"
"Please stop saying that."
I rolled my eyes.
"Anyway, that's not why they call them that you know?" James continued carefully, his gaze every so often turning around to the rest of the common room.
"Sure it is, if it was meant to be bad they would have called them Maggotblood or something worse."
"Sirius!" James Potter groaned, covering his face with his hands.
"What? There's literally nothing wrong with mud- It's used to grow vegetables n' shit."
James Potter's expression twitched as he kept a passive look at me.
I rolled my eyes again.
"Lighten up, you big baby. It's a freakin' word." Not like they nicknamed them after a secret curse. Would've been a hell of a lot more efficient in showing their hate that way.
James Potter's expression, causing me to sigh at the realization, paled further.
"...Are... Are you actually a terrible person?"
I blinked in bemusement and mock-shock. I've certainly been called worse. Laughing Tree for one- I should really keep a lid on that one. If I'd learned anything so far, it was that I tended to monologue at the worst possible times. Sometimes the best solution was to just not think about particular subjects.
"I am not saying I'd do that!" I stated, paused for a single beat to pass before continuing; "But yeah, hypothetically speaking, if I was a bigot, I would've gone with an actual curse."
James Potter opened his mouth to speak.
"Besides, they do the same to us by calling us bigots."
"...That's because we started it!"
When the others, probably mudbloods at that, made to join in by agreeing I promptly leveled a stare at them and told them they literally didn't have the right to voice an opinion on the matter.
James Potter elbowed me for that one.
In my defense, it was intended as a joke.
"Right," I continued on, completely ignoring the other's action as I turned my gaze back to James. "Real mature of 'em. If they'd taken the high ground and ignored it, our bigotted ancestors may have actually respected them for it." I shrugged writing down step three.
"...You are so weird."
"Mhm. Just remember Potter," I raised a single finger towards him. "An eye for an eye tends to leave the whole world blind!"
"...But we each have two eyes, so wouldn't two be left? And we can grow them back anyway as long as it's not a curse..."
"...You're missing the point."
"Hang on, you're not supposed to be teaching me here, I am supposed to be teaching you!"
"You're doing a splendid job."
James blinked once, a hopeful expression filtering into his face at the words. "Does this mean you're going to stop using that word?"
"Sure." I grinned in response. "I am just going to make another one up for them!"
"...I take it back, just call them mudbloods-"
"Nah, you've convinced me otherwise!" I remarked, standing up.
"Sirius where are you going-"
"Library, I need a book on curses!"
"Sirius! No! Bad Black! Don-" The boy haphazardly got up off his seat, his words coming out rapidly as panic covered his face, before promptly tripping in the process in his hurry.
"Now whose the racist?" I sighed, shaking my head. "You've got a lot-" I promptly moved my head out of the way of the incoming spell, leveling an accusatory look towards Lily Evans before promptly helping James up with a hand. "See what I mean? They literally ask for it-" I promptly pulled James in the way of the next spell from the girl.
Honestly, whoever thought teaching Lily Evans offensive spells was a good idea, ought to end up in Azkaban.
Speaking of which, step three 'Tell a blood-obsessed idiot he's way more talented than everyone else.'
I really should make that step one, now that I think about it-
"You know... He does have a point..." Another, pureblood, Gryffindor seemed to agree with me as he stood up, nodding his head for a moment. "You shouldn't just attack someone like that Evans... It gives us more of a reason to call you a mud-"
I promptly lashed out with a hint of magic towards the Second-year idiot, the force behind the wave of magic throwing him back into his seat with a wince.
"Watch your mouth," I deadpanned to the utterly confused Gryffindor. "You don't have the skill to back up the ego it's spouting."
To my surprise, the second year didn't deign to draw his wand, for whatever reason. Electing to keep quiet instead, albeit glaring at me in the process.
Needless to say, Lily Evans took that as a challenge as she made to fire off more spells towards me.
With another roll of my eyes, I promptly turned my back towards her and walked away. My head angling to the sides as every spell harmlessly flew by me.
Each one tended to set off my instincts, warning me beforehand in a way- Evidently, I was rather sensitive to spells.
Go figure.
I'd use James as a shield, but the traitor had elected to keep himself out of reach.
When Evans went for my legs, I idly tripped a nearby seat onto the way of the incoming spell, the shattering chair thankfully not hitting me in the process.
Seriously. Step one really ought to be to give children literal weapons of mass destruction.
With that thought in mind, I promptly took the parchment out and scribbled it in, idly ducking my head as another spell flew over it.
"How is he doing that!?" Lily Evans called out with a huff and very clear frustration.
Rookie.