Bai Xi's PoV:
It has been almost an hour after we have had our quite dinner, surprisingly, where we actually didn't broach any hard topics and just talked about some lighter subjects.
We had just finished cleaning up the dishes together, when Si Yihan got an urgent work call.
Well being CEO sure has its own downsides.
While he was still on the call, in the meantime, I decided to take a shower, to clear my head a little and ruminate over everything that has happened today.
I sagged against the cool tiles of my bathtub, as the hot water felt good against my aching body.
Feeling somewhat glad taking a break after feeling so overwhelmed with everything that happened in the past few hours itself.
I silently stewed on everything that happened today. It has been a rollercoaster of a day, as just this morning I was feeling depressed about not being with him and now I am feeling happy and restless at the prospect of being with him.
Happy because it all feels right somehow, and restless with dread surging in every second on the possibility of him finding out the truth.
Well now I don't mind him finding out but I feel tensed about the anger and betrayal that would follow the truth.
I don't know how to tell him in the first place but more than the truth—I think it has got lot more to do with the fact that for some reason he not only hates this marriage but also the person he is married to, whom he actually plegded to have nothing to do with.
And to top of it all, I can also feel some sort of resentment burning through him whenever he talks about the person he is married to, which happens to be me, but he doesn't know that in the first place.
And seeing he doesn't know me and we have never met before in person, it only indicates the fact that— all this hatred has something to do with the circumstances that we got married into and how he was forced into it.
Feeling too overwhelmed with the complexities of all i decided to let nature take its course.
I would wait for some time and see wherever all this is leading to. If the interest was only because of denial or if it would actually lead to somewhere.
I would wait until I feel the time is right before I tell Si Yihan anything. I would see wherever it leads to before I tell him anything. Given the way things are already so complex, I don't want to add up on them when our feelings or relationship or whatever it is..is still in the initial stages.
I sagged against the tub as my thoughts finally calmed down. I drained off the tub when I felt the water cooling, and patted myself dry while still contemplating on everything.
And the conclusion that I reached is—All in all I only understood this much that getting married was against his wishes in the first place and to whom was totally going against everything. But then if he was so aversed to getting married, then why would his grandfather force him to marry me when he could have had anyone he ever wanted. Why would his grandfather go against his own favourite grandson's wishes when he could have picked anyone else he wanted.
Honestly I am a little scared of his reaction but at the same time I want him to know so that I could understand where his anger and resentment has come from.
Because one thing is clear he hates the person he is married to.
I slapped on some moisturizer and was blow drying my hair when a knock sounded on the door, snapping me out of my thoughts, as the door opened, which I realised I had actually forgot to lock in the first place.
Si Yihan poked his head in, "Hey" his eyes roaming on me.
"Hey" I said back.
After giving me an assessing look, he carefully stepped inside as if waiting for me to go off in some way and bursting on him.
I arched an eyebrow at his reaction while he silently covered the distance between us and stopped in front of me.
I arched my neck up, to look at him. He has a light stubble on his face, a day's worth I think. I took in his face while he cupped mine and apologized, "Sorry, it took so long."
"It's okay. I don't mind." I replied after a pause.."And I needed it."
I meant it because I do needed to underwhelm myself. Gave me enough time to calm down, emotionally at least.
And the bath worked like a charm.
Always has!
I didn't add any of that though.
He opened his mouth,"Xi'uer, I didn't..." his tone placating, but I cut him off before he could say more.
"Shh it's not bad, I seriously needed time to think."
"You mean overthink it" he said as if he knew that's what I did exactly.
My eyes widened at his claim that I would do anything like that.
"Why would I do that?" I asked him with a horrified look on my face.
"Because you did the last few times?!" He said as if it is a matter of fact.
I opened my mouth in retort but I actually didn't have one for this so I casually shrugged and shamelessly stated, "Atleast I didn't took off this time."
"Yeah and trust me I am relieved about that." He said exasperatedly.
"You seriously thought I would runaway?" I asked inquisitively.
I actually came prepared with a few sound facts, in case you'd find million different reasons to break this off" he stated.
"Yeah maybe I would have, but I didn't." I shrugged nonchalantly.
His eyes widened before he realised I was just kidding.
"And also, I came to a conclusion." I said seriously.
He tightened his hold on me pulling me flush against the length of him while taking hold of my chin in his hand, "Well whatever conclusion you reached it would better end with me and you together."
"Yeah something like that." I said back.
He raised an eyebrow at that, silently asking me to elaborate on that.
"I mean I didn't think that far ahead. I only thought about today and everything that has happened so far. Which to be honest made me reluctant to do anything other than give this a chance..." I paused and said..."give us a chance."
Pure relief shined in his eyes, he pressed a kiss on my forehead and tightened his hold on my waist while pulling me impossibly closer and with a tinge of seduction, muttered his low, raspy voice in my ear, "Finally we are on the same page!"
I only smiled in return.
....
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